


Actual Disney Princess Adrien Agreste

by Book_Squirrel



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrinette, Crack, Disney, Disney Princesses - Freeform, F/M, Identity Reveal, LadyNoir - Freeform, Marichat, So much singing, broadway when we can have it, dead memes, ladrien
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-06-25 00:38:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 23,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19734853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Book_Squirrel/pseuds/Book_Squirrel
Summary: We’re starting with Tangled, ending with Sleeping Beauty, and taking a detour through the Ancestors’ scene from Mulan for the Kwamis.





	1. Tangled

‘Kid. Kid. KID!’

‘Not now, Plagg.’ Adrien rolled over and bumped his nose on the hard floor. His eyes opened to see a heavily painted floor of wide wooden planks.

He sat up. ‘Uh. Plagg?’

‘Over here, kid.’

Adrien looked around for the voice. The room was circular and made of stones. Wooden beams cross-crossed overhead to support the roof. He sat up and looked down.

Metres upon metres of long, golden hair spilled around him. It twisted about his legs—wait, a pink dress? The hair lay over his chest and shoulders.

Adrien scrambled to his feet and found a mirror hanging over a small chest. He gripped the handfuls of hair. ‘I’m Rapunzel?’ He stepped back and posed.

‘Looks like it, kid.’

The trunk shifted as something landed on it.

Adrien looked down. ‘Uh, Plagg?’

Plagg’s tongue whipped out and caught a passing bug. ‘Yeah, it’s me.’

‘Why are you a chameleon?’

‘I blame Disney. Rapunzel didn’t have a chameleon last time we saw her.’

‘What did she have?’

‘Adrien?’

Adrien fumbled for his white shirt. ‘Hide, Pla—oh.’

Plagg blinked at Adrien before changing his colour to match the trunk.

Gabriel appeared dressed in a long, flowing burgundy dress.

Adrien gaped.

‘What the _hell_ am I wearing?’

‘Uh, Père?’

Gabriel paced around the tower, arms clasped tightly behind his back. ‘Can’t one glower in one’s home in peace anymore?’

‘Father?’

‘These Akumas are becoming more ineffective and inconvenient with each day.’

‘Gabriel?’

Gabriel stopped and stared down at his offspring. ‘What?’

‘You have a perm.’

The designer marched to the mirror and stared at the waist-length spiral curled hair. ‘Not again.’

Adrien sat down. This was not at all how he imagined his day going. ‘What do you mean, “not again”?’

‘Your mother is going to kill me.’ Gabriel ran a hand through his hair. It stuck near his scalp. ‘She swore she would leave me if I permed my hair again.’

Adrien’s mouth hung open. ‘Hwa? Whohuauhperm?’

‘And what happened to your hair? No, wait.’ Gabriel stopped and pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Are we in a fairy tale?’

‘Worse. I think we’re in _Tangled_.’

Gabriel blinked. ‘Wasn’t the Akuma called—?’

‘Akuma Matata?’ Adrien rolled his eyes. ‘Yep. Definitely one of Hawkmoth’s worse puns.’

Gabriel bristled slightly.

‘You’d think he’d be better about not stealing an ancient meme off of the internet.’

Gabriel said in the iciest of tones, ‘What were you doing before arriving here?’

‘I was at school.’ Adrien rubbed the back of his neck. ‘We were evacuating the school. Next thing I knew, I woke up here.’

‘Hm, I’m going to speak with your principal about security.’

‘What about you, Father? What were you doing?’

‘I was in the middle of a conference call.’

‘Was Nathalie with you? Maybe the Akuma got her too and she’s outside? Or do you think it only caught certain people?’

‘I suppose there’s one way to find out.’ Gabriel shook his head at his son’s hair. ‘Isn’t Rapunzel’s hair supposed to be cut?’

Adrien turned red. ‘O-o-only after she gets-gets pregnant by the prince?’

‘Please don’t get pregnant.’

Adrien said, ‘Rest assured, Father, I have zero intention of becoming a teenage mother.’

‘That’s always the plan,’ muttered the designer.

‘ _What_?’

Gabriel turned and looked in the mirror again, pulling at a clump of his curly hair. ‘I suppose it is only temporary.’

Adrien walked over to the window. ‘Do you think we could get out this way? In the movie, Rapunzel gets out without cutting her hair.’

‘You are staying right here. I will go out and see if there is anyone who can explain what is happening.’

Adrien exhaled heavily through his nostrils. Typical. He landed in a Disney movie and his father _still_ wouldn’t let him leave the house. Where was Nathalie when you needed her?

He thought for a moment, wondering what role she would have. Flynn Rider? One of the Rogues at the Snuggly Duckling?

The idea of Nathalie singing about having a dream—scratch that. The idea of Nathalie singing at all made him snigger.

‘What’s so funny?’

‘I’m wondering who Nathalie would be in this scenario.’

Gabriel gave him a disappointed look. ‘There’s a hook here. Throw your hair over it so I can get down. I’ll be back by nightfall.’

‘Yes, Father.’

Gabriel climbed down the golden hair, muttering the whole way, and disappeared into the woods.

After pulling the hair back in, Adrien rested his elbows against the windowsill, cupped his chin in his hands, and sighed. ‘At least Father’s here. I guess I can’t ask for much more. Except I guess a door?’ He traced the carvings on the windowsill with his finger.

Plagg the Chameleon jumped onto the sill. ‘Now that your old man is gone, do you think we could find some cheese? I’m starving!’

‘Do you think Pascal would eat cheese?’

Plagg gave him a Look.

Adrien fell over from laughing. ‘Sorry,’ he said through his tears. ‘You look just like Pascal!’

‘Ha-ha. But what are you going to do now that you’re not Chat Noir? And how exactly are we supposed to get out of here?’

‘What, you don’t like being a chameleon?’ Adrien hummed. ‘Oh!’ His green eyes lit up. ‘Remember the line about sewing dresses and Pascal is her model?’

‘I swear by the Guardian himself—!’

A scuffling sound came from down below.

Adrien looked down and saw a dark head and long arms climbing up the vines. ‘Ho, there! Slow going?’

Marinette looked up at him. ‘Wrong movie,’ she grunted. She looked back at the vines before looking up and squinting. She gasped and flailed before finding a better grip on the vines. In a higher tone, she said, ‘Adrien? Are you Rapunzel?’

‘Looks like it. I’m guessing you’re Flynn Rider by the costume.’

‘And the fact that I have a horse following me?’

Adrien leaned further out the window, despite Plagg’s grunts of protest. ‘Oh, yeah, you do. Must be Destiny.’

She glared at him.

He rubbed the back of his neck. ‘Why is it red with black spots?’

‘Don’t ask.’

‘Fine. Do you need any help?’

He wasn’t sure, but it sounded almost like she said, ‘ _Do you need any help?_ ’ in a mocking tone. Surely Marinette was too kind for that.

Marinette clawed her way up the rest of the vines and swung her leg over the windowsill. She shook her head. Even the power that was her crush was no match for the sheer absurdity of the situation. ‘Do you have any idea why we’re here?’

Adrien repeated the story he gave his father. ‘What were you doing?’

Her eyes got a faraway look before snapping back to the present. ‘I was evacuating with the rest of the class. Next thing I know, I’m here.’ She looked down and swiped at the stains on her trousers. ‘I’m just glad I got the trousers and waistcoat.’

Adrien’s face took on a dreamy smile. Her legs were almost as lovely as Ladybug’s. ‘The boots suit you. Really glad the Akuma didn’t give you facial hair, though.’

Marinette grinned. ‘Me, too.’

Adrien rubbed his baby-smooth face and sighed. ‘Someday, hopefully.’

‘Oh, wow!’ Marinette squatted down. ‘You got Pascal! Why is he black?’

Plagg played dumb and unimpressed.

‘Not sure. He hasn’t said a word,’ he gave Plagg a hard look, ‘ _just like in the movie_.’

Plagg rolled his eyes before jerking his head at the window.

Adrien said, ‘Do you think we can just leave or do I have to hit you with the frying pan and shove you in the wardrobe?’

‘Um, depends. Who’s Mother Gothel in this?’

‘My father.’

Marinette gave the fakest smile possible. Nino would have been proud because no, that wasn’t suggestive at all! She squeaked, ‘And where is he?’

‘He went off to look and see if anyone else is here. Nathalie was with him when he got sucked here and she isn’t here now.’

‘Wow, maybe your father does have a heart.’

Adrien covered her mouth. ‘Let’s not go there.’

‘Why?’

‘Alice in Wonderland? The Grinch? Anything involving hearts?’

‘Can we get out of here, please?’ said Plagg.

Marinette stared. ‘It talks?’ She gave Adrien a sharp look.

‘Yes, I talk,’ grumbled the kwami-turned-lizard. ‘And right now I just want to get home.’

‘Marinette?’ said a high-pitched female voice. ‘Are you coming down at all?’

Marinette leaned over the window. ‘Seriously, Tikki?’

‘Wait, Tikki?’ said Adrien. ‘Isn’t that Ladybug’s kwami’s name?’

‘Uh, yes?’ Marinette mentally kicked herself.

Adrien smacked himself on the forehead. ‘That must mean Ladybug is nearby! Maybe she got sucked in here too!’

‘Sure! But we shouldn’t depend on her to get us out. Do you think Chat Noir is here?’

Adrien didn’t dare look at Plagg. ‘Maybe, but I wouldn’t count on it.’

‘Well, now that I’m here,’ said Marinette, ‘we should probably leave.’

‘There’s even the hook for my hair,’ said Adrien. ‘Why did you climb up here if we’re just going back down?’

‘I felt compelled to.’

‘That’d be the Akuma’s magic,’ said Plagg with a yawn. One of his eyes tracked a fly. Hopefully it had eaten Camembert recently.

‘Marinette?’ called Tikki.

‘All right, Rapunzel,’ said Marinette. ‘Shall we get you out of this tower?’

‘After you, Princess.’ Adrien tried to give a Chat-bow and tripped over his hair. He banged his head against the wall. ‘Ow.’ He rubbed his head. ‘Stupid German manufacturing and woodwork.’

‘Are you okay?’ said Marinette.

‘Yeah, but if I can’t walk a straight line due to a concussion, I’m sending Hawkmoth a strongly worded letter concerning the ruin of my features.’ He collected as much of his hair as he could and threw it over the hook.

He stared down at the ground.

Marinette straddled the windowsill. ‘Are you coming?’

‘It’s really far down.’

‘ _Just smell the grass, the dirt—_ ’

‘ _Just like I dreamed they’d be_.’ Adrien smiled. ‘Thanks.’

Marinette climbed down by the branches.

Plagg jumped onto Adrien’s shoulder. ‘Let’s go, kid.’

Adrien grabbed fistfuls of his hair and soared down to the ground. He landed lightly on his feet and spun around. ‘That was totally awesome!’

Marinette slid the last few feet down the tower.

Adrien caught her in his arms.

Both blushed.

Marinette scrambled out of his arms and said, ‘Well, let’s see how to get out of this Akuma’s world.’

Adrien followed her into the forest. It seemed to be a similar direction as his father had taken. Not that he had been able to see much with the density of the tree canopy.

‘I hope we find my father soon,’ said Adrien, yanking a fistful of hair from where it was stuck in a log.

‘Why?’ said Marinette.

Plagg dozed on Tikki’s back.

Adrien looped the freshly freed hair over his arms. ‘Because I don’t want to lose him. He’s the only parent I have left.’

‘I guess so. Don’t you think it’s strange that he’s Mother Gothel?’

Adrien chuckled. ‘What I found strange was that he has a perm.’

Marinette stopped short, eyes bugging out. ‘Now there’s an image I never needed.’

‘I think it’s good for him.’ Adrien collapsed into the grass and threw his head back. ‘I’m never complaining about my hair at home again.’

‘That heavy?’ Marinette sat down next him.

‘Not heavy; just awkward. It’s exhausting.’

Marinette pulled up handfuls of grass and sprinkled them over Adrien.

He opened an eye and looked at her. ‘What are you doing?’

‘Well, Mr Isolated-Because-I-Have-Rich-And-Paranoid-Parents, this is a standard summer ritual for children.’ She pulled up another handful of grass and sprinkled it over Adrien’s face. ‘It is a truth universally acknowledged that it is not truly summer until you have torn up handfuls of grass and sprinkled them over your friends.’

‘I like having you as a friend.’

Marinette blushed.

Tikki-the-Horse huffed.

The Snuggly Duckling was empty. Completely and totally empty.

‘Where is everyone?’ said Marinette, looking around. She opened doors and looked in the darkest corners. ‘This place should be crowded.’

‘And I was looking forward to my big musical number.’ Adrien sat down on a chair.

‘Were you really?’ said Marinette, finding two clean glasses and filling them with water. She gave one to Adrien.

He took it. ‘Yeah, I love singing. Father cancelled singing lessons after my mom disappeared.’

Marinette chugged her water and slammed the cup down. ‘Who says we can’t sing together?’

‘Really?’ Adrien’s face lit up.

‘Really.’ She stood and pulled him to his feet. ‘Maybe singing will bring people in.’

She ran to the stage and ran her fingers over the ivory keys of the piano. ‘ _I’m malicious, mean and scary…_ ’

Adrien grinned and watched in rapture as she jumped around the stage, singing the different verses.

‘ _Can’t you see me with a special little Chaton/ Rowing in a rowboat down the Seine?_ ’

Adrien jumped onto the table. ‘ _I’ve got a dream!_ ’

Tikki’s voice cut in. ‘ _And Gorilla collects ceramic unicorns!_ ’

They all looked at Plagg.

He sighed. ‘ _I’ve got dreams like you, no really/ Just much less touchy feely/ They mainly happen somewhere warm and cheesy…_ ’

‘What?’ whispered Marinette, watching the chameleon prance about.

‘... _Super rested and villain-free/ Surrounded by endless Camembert!’_ He paused for dramatic effect and blinked at the humans. ‘Good enough?’

Adrien grinned.

He and Marinette harmonised, ‘ _Yes, way down deep inside I’ve got a dreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeam! Yeah!_ ’ 

They collapsed against one of the walls and laughed until they could only sigh with contentment.

At last, Adrien said, ‘Hey, Marinette?’

‘Yeah?’

‘I’m glad you’re here. That was fun.’

‘Do you know what would be even more fun?’

‘What?’

‘Braiding your hair so that it stops catching on everything and slowing us down.’

If he had been transformed, Adrien would have purred the entire time. Having someone play with his hair and not shove it full of product was a dream come true.

‘There,’ said Marinette an hour later. ‘That should be good.’

Adrien stood up. The braid stopped at his ankles. ‘That feels so much better!’ He twisted and looked around. ‘Nice braiding.’

‘Thank you.’

‘But where are my flowers?’ He turned his nose up.

Marinette suddenly realised how much he resembled his father.

‘Ladybug would have given me flowers.’

Marinette bristled. ‘All right, Chloe!’

Adrien flinched. ‘Sorry, it was a joke.’

Marinette took a deep breath. ‘No, I’m sorry. Um, hm. Maybe the Akuma is changing our personalities a little.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I would never talk to you like this at home. Maybe I feel a little more like Flynn Rider.’

‘It reminds me a little of how Ladybug treats Chat Noir.’

Marinette grimaced. ‘Is she really that mean to him?’

‘No, but she is really focussed and a perfectionist. Sometimes she acts like he’s a hindrance.’

‘Chat Noir is a huge help! Ladybug wouldn’t have been able to do a fraction of what she does without Chat Noir to support her!’ Marinette stomped her foot on the floorboards.

The floor tilted beneath them.

All four slid down and into the river.

Gabriel looked up and tried to measure how much daylight was left. The thought of leaving Adrien alone overnight and unprotected was terrifying.

Screaming broke through the silence of the forest.

He ran through the brush and trees.

There, on the bank of the river, Marinette and Adrien were scrambling out of the river.

They were laughing.

A red horse with black spots scrambled up onto the bank. A black cat—

Gabriel squinted.

Not a cat. A chameleon sat on the horse’s back. Its shrill voice complained about all the wet.

‘Just be glad you’re a lizard right now,’ said Adrien, squeezing the water out of his hair as best as possible. ‘You’re the only one who isn’t water-logged here.’

Marinette shook her head, sending water flying everywhere. ‘We should build a fire. It’s going to be dark soon.’

‘Do you know how to make one?’ Adrien wrung out his skirt.

‘Nope, but I’m guessing Flynn Rider does. Meet me back here in fifteen minutes. I guess this is as good as any place to make camp.’

‘Sounds good.’ Adrien placed a hand on her shoulder. ‘You’re amazing, you know?’

She stammered, ‘You amaztoo! I’m as well!’

He laughed.

Marinette and her bright red face disappeared amongst the trees.

Adrien walked along, collecting sticks and branches.

Gabriel stepped out and onto the bank. ‘Adrien.’

Adrien jumped, dropping the sticks. ‘F-father?’

‘I thought I told you not to leave the tower,’ said Gabriel in his calmest tone. He automatically gripped his hands behind his back.

‘Well, yeah, but Marinette found me and we didn’t want to stay in the tower—’

‘It’s dangerous out here. We don’t know what threats there are.’

‘Father, have you seen or heard anything but us out here? Even the Snuggly Duckling—’

‘The what?’

‘The bar where Rapunzel sings “I’ve Got a Dream”.’

Gabriel raised an eyebrow.

‘But even that was completely deserted.’ His smile grew dreamy. ‘But I’m having a great time with Marinette. She’s just a great friend.’

‘People in our position do not have the luxury of friends.’

‘But Father—’

‘Adrien, listen to me. You’re at the age when you start to think you know everything. It’s natural. It happens to everyone.’

Adrien blinked up at his father. ‘Even you?’

Gabriel’s shoulders stiffened. ‘Yes, even me. And that is when we need our parents the most. We cannot afford the luxury of friends because people will simply try to use us.’ His gaze grew more intense. ‘To use you.’

Adrien looked down at the rich grass and combed it with his toes. ‘But she’s always been so helpful and friendly.’

‘Those are the ones we have to look out for the most. Because those are the ones who will abandon you when there’s nothing else you can do for them.’

Adrien glared at his father. ‘No! That’s not Marinette. She’s brave and true and the best friend I could ever have! And when she’s confident, she’s the most amazing woman in the world!’

Gabriel’s eyes narrowed. ‘Even more than Ladybug?’

The boy’s mouth dropped open.

‘I know of your infatuation with her.’ He took a step closer.

Adrien backed up.

‘Ladybug is nothing more than an idea. With time, she will fade. She will leave you with nothing more than a dream of what might have been.’

Adrien backed into a tree.

‘And Marinette is nothing more than an aspiring designer using you to get a foot in the door.’

As Adrien stared at the grass, Gabriel said gently, ‘Is she really any different from your other fans?’

Adrien glared at his father. He pushed off from the tree and marched up to his father, facing him as best as he could while still so much shorter.

_When will my growth spurt begin?_

‘Marinette has never asked for anything from me. She’s the kindest, most selfless person you’ll ever meet. You just have to give her a chance!’ Adrien’s face turned a dull red. ‘What are so afraid of? I just don't see how a world that makes such wonderful people could be bad?’

A roaring filled the air.

Father and son looked at the river as it flooded its banks. In a few seconds, the water was up to Adrien’s waist. 

Plagg yelped and jumped onto Adrien’s shoulder. 

The current knocked Adrien’s feet out from under him. ‘Father!’

Gabriel dove through the water and reached for Adrien.

Adrien floundered under the water. ‘Papa!’

The water sucked them down into the darkness.


	2. The Little Mermaid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to free the sea, face the Akuma, and sing a few Broadway songs.

Marinette grinned as she balanced on the prow of the ship. The wind teased her hair and the sea salt smell triggered a sense of adventure that she hadn’t felt outside of her suit. ‘Isn’t this perfection, Tikki?’

A human version of Tikki looked decidedly green. ‘Your Highness, we must return to court to honour your father’s dying wish.’

A beautiful tenor voice filled the air.

Marinette stood up straight, her balance instinctively adjusting for the sway of the waves. ‘What is that?’

A sailor said, ‘A sea creature, no doubt sent to draw us to the fathoms below. Hold on, good luck, as down you go!’

The tenor voice filled the air on the opposite side of the ship.

Marinette ran lightly along the railing and up the rope ladders. ‘There it is again! Follow that voice! To the ends of the earth if we have to!’

‘Aye-aye, Captain!’

Tikki watched her Chosen leap around the ship. As happy as Marinette looked, as relaxed as Marinette looked, there would only be Ursula to pay later.

Marinette leaned out from the ladder. She sang out, ‘ _Where did he go? Where can he be? When he come again/ calling to me?_ ’ Her smile disappeared. ‘Chat Noir, where are you? _Come set me free…Come set me free!_ ’

‘Look at all this stuff!’ Adrien swam around, delighted at the agility his new tail gave him. ‘Isn’t it neat?’

Plagg scowled. He had turned into a crab for this world. ‘It’s a cave full of Ladybug merchandise. It’s not that different from the space under your bathroom sink and the bottom drawer of your closet.’

‘Yeah, but there’s so much here that would make my collection complete!’ Adrien stopped by a stone shelf before turning to him. ‘Besides, this is an underwater grotto. So much cooler than a simple cave.’

‘Yeah, yeah.’ Plagg scrambled after Adrien, wondering when this madness would end.

Adrien whirled and put his hands on his hips. ‘Look, Plagg, I thought we were going to drown after the river rose like that. Look at us now. Not only did we survive but I’m a freaking mermaid!’

‘Yes, you’re a merman and I’m a crab.’

Adrien grinned. ‘Yep. You’ve finally achieved your true form. Watch out for any chefs.’

Plagg squinted and bit back an especially foul curse.

Adrien draped himself over a life-size statue of Ladybug, a replica of the one crafted by Theo for the park, and sighed with contentment. His tail twitched with adoration.

‘What is this?’ said a low voice.

Adrien jumped.

Plagg gulped and skittered under a rock.

Gabriel emerged from the shadows, a trident in his hand.

Even in his fear, Adrien had to smother a laugh at his father wearing a suit jacket and shirt with cravat even as a merman. ‘Father!’ He swam over. ‘You’re safe!’

Gabriel’s gaze swept over the grotto. ‘Is this yours?’

Adrien flushed and stammered, ‘Y-yes—yes, sir.’

‘Get rid of it.’

‘What? Why?’

Gabriel’s tail twitched. ‘I refuse to allow you near that world. _My world is law. This filth you bring here is the final straw!_ ’

Adrien muttered, ‘It’s not filth.’

Gabriel whirled around. ‘What did you say?’

‘A lot of it is custom made! My collection’s almost complete!’

‘Get rid of it. I’ll have Nathalie collect it—’ Gabriel faltered, remembering that his assistant had yet to be seen.

Tears gathered in Adrien’s eyes. ‘Father, I love her! I love Ladybug!’

‘She’s a superhero! She’ll get you killed!’ Gabriel pointed the trident at a shelf full of collectables. ‘ _I’ll make you obey/ ‘Til you do as I say./ I don’t care, come what may/ But I’ll keep you away/ From that cruel, harsh, cold, vile world above!_ ’

The trident glowed in his father’s hands.

‘No!’

Light and magic flew about the grotto, destroying everything in its path.

A look of pure hatred etched itself onto Gabriel’s features as he destroyed the replicas of his nemesis, the object of his son’s adoration.

‘Father!’ Adrien swam out of the way as a beam of light nearly struck him.

He gasped as his father aimed at the statue. ‘No!’

The statue exploded. Pieces flew all over the grotto.

Adrien screamed and swam to where the head rolled to a stop. He picked it up and cradled it.

Gabriel’s chest heaved with the released emotion. He swam away, swallowed up by the shadows.

Adrien threw himself on a convenient rock and sobbed.

Plagg crept out from under his protection and over to his Chosen. ‘It’s okay.’

‘No it’s not!’ Adrien covered his face with his hands. ‘If he hates just a representation of her so much, then what will he do when he actually sees her?’

The Kwami-turned-Crustacean tried to ignore the twist of fear in his gut. ‘Remember, we’re trapped in a world created by an Akuma. There’s no telling if he actually hates Ladybug that much.’

Adrien wiped his face. His lip trembled. ‘You think so?’

‘I mean, if you think about it, the world isn’t so bad here.’

Adrien looked at his tale. ‘It’s _The Little Mermaid_ , isn’t it?’

Plagg nodded.

‘Can you sing “Under the Sea” for me?’

Eyes bugging, Plagg said, ‘Suuuuure.’ He coughed and cleared his throat. ‘ _Under da sea! Under da sea!_ ’

Adrien covered his ears. ‘Never mind.’ He grinned at Plagg. ‘ _Guess who gonna be on the plate!_ ’

Plagg stuck his tongue out. He sniffed the air and tensed. ‘Me thinks the witch is about to make her entrance.’

‘Who’s the witch? Father’s King Triton.’

‘Poor child,’ crooned a voice.

‘Poor, sweet child,’ echoed another.

Adrien grabbed Plagg and clutched him to his chest as two eels slipped into the grotto.

They grinned at him. ‘ _Sweet child, dear child, we’re bring you to the lair right now!_ ’

‘You can be with together with Ladybug,’ said one.

‘Forever,’ purred the other.

Plagg pinched Adrien with his new claws.

Adrien swallowed his fear. ‘Take me to her.’

It seemed hours later when the dim lights of a cave broke through the darkness of the sea.

The eels went straight to the cave.

Adrien gulped and followed. He had to do this. It was for the plot.

He stopped at the entrance to the cave. ‘Akuma Matata! Pl—’

Plagg made a cutting motion across his throat.

‘My sweet child,’ said the Akuma. Tentacles spread over the cave floor. ‘Gabriel’s precious treasure.’

Despite the cool water, Adrien felt a cold sweat break out. ‘How did you become an Akuma?’

‘That’s a story for another time,’ said the Akuma. ‘But you’re looking for Ladybug? I can reunite her with her.’

Adrien’s heart pounded. ‘You can do that?’

‘But of course. I only want to help.’

‘What’s the price?’

‘A token, merely a trifle.’ The Akuma grinned, exposing all of her teeth. ‘Your voice.’

Adrien nodded. ‘Whatever it takes.’

‘Excellent choice. Now, sing! Sing as you’ve never sung before.’

The Little Merman opened his mouth and sang.

The sunshine hurt, but the sand was warm beneath his bare back.

Adrien squinted and sat up. His legs gleamed in the sunlight. ‘Pla—?’ He touched his throat. No voice. 

He found the kwami underneath a piece of sailcloth.

Plagg spat out a piece of seaweed. ‘I hate making deals.’ He squinted at Adrien. ‘Might want to put something on unless you want to risk Ladybug seeing you in all your glory.’

Adrien turned a brilliant shade of red and wrapped the sailcloth around his waist.

‘Hmm,’ said Plagg. ‘A non-chatty Chat Noir? I may like this reality.’

Adrien made a rude gesture and immediately tripped, landing face-first in the sand.

Voices echoed around the bend of the beach.

Adrien rolled over and made sure everything necessary was covered.

Marinette rounded the large rock and stared.

A reddish looking woman walked beside her.

‘Adrien!’ Marinette ran across the sand.

He stared, mouth open. She looked even more gorgeous than before dressed in the billowing white shirt and black sea boots.

She slid to a stop beside him. ‘Adrien, what are you doing here? Are you okay? Where are your-your—?’ She turned even redder.

‘Where are your clothes?’ said the woman beside her.

‘Don’t be rude,’ said Marinette. She helped Adrien stand up. ‘I’m glad you’re safe.’

Adrien smiled, happy to have Marinette’s support.

Sadness flicked across her face. ‘I just wish I could find Chat Noir. I know Ladybug’s safe, her kwami’s here, but I haven’t seen him.’

Adrien opened his mouth but sighed when he remembered that he couldn’t speak.

Marinette brightened. ‘It’s okay. We’ll get you up to the palace and find some clothes.’

‘Might I suggest a bath as well?’ said Tikki. Her eyes ran over the sand. She bent and scooped up Plagg before shoving him in her pocket.

‘Good idea,’ said Marinette.

It was mid-afternoon when Adrien emerged from the bath, dressed in clothes found around the palace.

Marinette flushed and smiled at him. ‘Driena! Adrien! You look fabulous.’

Adrien bowed and offered his arm.

They walked through the palace, exploring the new home.

Marinette’s shoulders slowly relaxed. The silence became comfortable.

She tilted her head and looked up at him. ‘This is weird, but I almost feel like we’ve worked together before. I mean, I know we worked together on projects for school, but this is different. It’s fun.’

Adrien smiled. He felt the same. Marinette’s stammering and stuttering had made it difficult to build relationship with her, but now, as they danced around the ballroom, it felt good. It felt right.

It felt balanced.

When he snuggled down into bed that night, he realised that he hadn’t thought of Ladybug all evening.

He closed his eyes and sighed happily. Marinette was such a good friend.

Gabriel swam around the underwater palace. ‘Adrien? Adrien!’

The designer sank onto a rock, resting his forehead against the trident. ‘ _How could he just suddenly/ Completely disappear into thin water?/ It’s been two whole days/ And I don’t know where he has gone!_ ’

He looked up at the sea swirling in the faint daylight. ‘Where is my boy? _If only you come back I’ll change my way!_ _I’ll try to understand_ …’

Marinette watched Adrien sketching. ‘ _What is it about him/ That’s so wonderfully, impossibly familiar?_ ’

‘You go to school with him,’ said Tikki.

‘No, it’s more than that.’ Marinette smiled. ‘He reminds me of Chat Noir sometimes. And yet, he doesn’t say anything.’

Her toe swirled the water. ‘Where’s my _chaton_?’ She propped her chin on her hand. ‘If only…’

Plagg and Tikki sat a short distance away from Marinette and Adrien. They watched the young couple splash water at each other.

Marinette shrieked as she fell.

Adrien landed on top of her. He smiled sheepishly at her.

In a gentle voice, Plagg sang, ‘ _If only I knew how/ I’d make him see the light. If only it were up to me/ This would all turn out right…’_

Tikki placed a hand over Plagg. ‘ _I’d simply wave my paw/ And make their dreams come true._ ’ She smiled. ‘And wouldn’t that surprise them.’

Together they said, ‘If they only knew.’

It was the second setting of the sun.

Akuma Matata looked into the plate in her hand. She watched as Marinette and Adrien climbed into a boat and set off into the bay.

She growled and set the plate on a shelf. ‘Their identities are too obvious. Where is that dratted Hawkmoth?’

The eels curled around the cave. ‘What’s the poor sweet child to do?’

‘ _Such a shame_.’

‘ _Such a crime_.’

‘ _And now his second sun has set_.’ Akuma Matata tapped her nose and smiled. ‘Oh, this is too good. I’ll get Gabriel Agreste and that idiot son his as well. Flotsam! Jetsam!’

The eels perked up.

‘Get those two. I know how to end this.’

Marinette and Adrien floated through the bay. The comfortable silence had only increased with the second day. 

As they drifted, they slowly moved closer and closer together.

Adrien felt his feelings for Ladybug drift away. New, wonderful feelings for Marinette—sweet, confidant, courageous Marinette—crowded into his heart.

Marinette blinked at him, terrified of saying anything.

Adrien leaned in, wondering what would happen if he kissed her. She was so like Ladybug—

The boat tipped over and threw them into the water.

‘Tikki!’

Adrien felt a cold trail wrap around his wrists and bind them together. His tail grew back.

Marinette thrashed and fought the eel pulling her down.

‘Relax, child,’ said the eel. ‘Our mistress has provided for you as well.’

Adrien stared as Marinette’s legs fused together and turned into a tail.

‘Breathe, child. There’s no reason to drown.’

Marinette opened her mouth and stared.

The eel cooed. ‘It’s polite to thank someone when they save your life.’

Marinette punched the eel square on the nose. ‘You attacked us!’

The eel hissed and tightened its grip on Marinette.

‘Leave her alone!’ shouted Adrien. He gasped, realising his voice was back. ‘I didn’t have the full three days!’

‘Plans change, princey,’ said the eel dragging him. ‘Our mistress has a new plan.’

‘Mistress?’ said Marinette. ‘The Akuma?’

‘I’m sorry, Marinette. I don’t know how you got dragged into this.’ Adrien scowled at the eels. ‘If Ladybug doesn’t show up, I’ll do our best to get us out.’

‘What about Chat Noir?’

Akuma Matata’s fingers drummed on her plate at the sight of the two heroes. ‘Flotsam! Jetsam! Where are their kwamis?’

‘We didn’t see them,’ whined one.

Marinette and Adrien locked eyes. Kwamis?

‘You idiots! They’re worthless without their kwamis.’ Akuma Matata frowned, spying the ring and earrings. ‘Or perhaps not.’

Her tentacles wriggled across the floor of the lair. ‘Perhaps you’re not completely useless. Hide them away. I’m expecting a visitor.’

Adrien and Marinette were shoved in a closet.

Marinette squeaked when her face slammed into Adrien’s chest. She looked up at him. ‘Sorry.’

‘Are you okay?’ he said, instinctively checking for injury.

‘A little bruised and confused, but I think I’m okay.’

‘Ursula!’

They froze at the deep voice bellowing into the cave.

‘Gabriel, darling! You’re right on cue!’

‘Father?’ Adrien pushed against the door of the closet.

It swung open.

They poked their heads around the door.

‘…Maybe swap your son’s soul for, say, your own?’

‘It’s not my soul you’re after.’

‘Which would you rather be? The Miraculous King of Paris? Or a father to your little son?’

Gabriel growled. ‘What are you talking about?’

‘It wasn’t that difficult,’ said the Akuma with a wave of her hand. ‘Now, shall I be taking Adrien? Or will you be a good papa for once?’

Gabriel took the seaweed pen and scrawled his name on the contract.

‘Father!’

‘Adrien!’ cried Marinette.

Akuma Matata cackled. ‘Finally! And now you poor unfortunate soul, time’s up!’

Adrien looked for a weapon. He saw a collector’s edition plate sitting on a shelf.

He grabbed the plate and prepared to throw it.

The reflection made him stop and stare. Ladybug!

He followed the angle to where the reflection should be.

Marinette?

He turned the mirror to himself.

Chat Noir winked back.

‘Mirror, mirror in my hand, who’s the fairest in all the land?’ He looked at the Akuma. ‘You poor, unfortunate soul! Time’s up!’

The grotto tilted. Gravity shifted, throwing everyone into the swirling darkness of the deep sea.


	3. Snow White

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snow White is one of the darker Disney tales. You've been warned.

Adrien dragged the heavy buckets down to the well and promptly dropped one on his foot. ‘Ow…’ He looked into the well and looked at his reflection. A red ribbon was tied into his hair.

He touched it and smiled. ‘Plagg! I’ve got a hair ribbon.’

‘Cool. Do you have any cheese?’

‘Do you know what this means?’

Plagg side-eyed Adrien. ‘It won’t mean anything if I don’t get cheese soon.’

‘It means I match Ladybug! This is so cool!’

‘That’s great kid. It won’t mean anything if I don’t have the energy to transform you.’

Adrien leaned against the ledge of the well. ‘ _I'm wishing for the one I love/ To find me today…_ ’

‘ _Today!_ ’

Adrien looked up and stared.

Ladybug perched on the courtyard wall and waved shyly. ‘Adrien, right?’

He stared, mouth open. ‘Y-y-you’re here!’

‘Did I frighten you?’ She slipped off the wall and walked closer.

Adrien dropped the bucket.

‘Now that I've found you,’ said Ladybug, ‘ _Hear what I have to say: One Song, I have but one song…_ ’

Her hand cupped his cheek.

Adrien’s breath grew shallow. This was where he normally woke up…

She leaned in closer and whispered, ‘ _One song/ Only for you_.’

‘Adrien!’ bellowed a voice from inside.

They jumped apart.

Adrien grabbed his bucket. ‘Come back l-later. I’ll be done with my work sometime around dusk.’

Ladybug looked at the midday sunshine. ‘That may be too late. Don’t you realise what story we’re in?’

He shook his head.

‘Adrien!’

‘I have to go, My Lady. I’ll see you later.’

He took the stairs two at a time and dropped the bucket by the back door. His feet instinctively took him through the castle—which seemed to mirror the floorplan for the mansion back home—and to a room similar to his father’s office.

‘Down here, boy.’

Adrien followed a narrow, spiralling staircase to the basement level. He gasped. ‘Hawkmoth?’

The terror of Paris stood with his back to Adrien and faced a large rose window. An extravagant cape of purple and black with a high collar covered the villain's shoulders. 

Adrien could just make out the villain’s reflection in the glass.

‘What have you been doing?’

‘I was-I was,’ Adrien rubbed his hands on his ragged skirt.

‘Stop mumbling.’ Hawkmoth turned around and rested his hands on his cane. ‘Have you finished your chores?’

‘Not yet, sir.’

‘I have a new task for you. The butterflies need fed and harvesting today.’

‘But sir!’

Hawkmoth walked over to Adrien and put a hand on his shoulder. ‘I need all of your cooperation if we’re going to capture Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculouses. Remember what we’re fighting for.’ He stroked Adrien’s cheek with his thumb. ‘Remember your mother.’

‘Y-y-yes, sir. Excuse me, sir.’

Adrien staggered from the lair and up the stairs. Snow White. Hawkmoth.

His mother.

He gripped the space over his heart. Hakwmoth wanted him as well as the Miraculouses. He needed to get out, run away. ‘Plagg, claws—’

Adrien stopped and realised that the Kwami was nowhere to be seen. ‘Plagg? Plagg!’

Ladybug dropped gently onto the balcony and padded her way down the corridor.

‘Come deeper, child,’ said the gentle voice.

She straightened her shoulders and dropped onto the narrow grassy area outside a rose window. With her yoyo, she swung through the open part of the window.

‘Welcome, Ladybug,’ said a voice in the gloom.

‘Who are you? Show yourself?’ Ladybug fought back the fear crawling over her. The room seemed full of it, stealing away the very air in the room.

Hawkmoth stepped out from the shadows.

She gasped and twirled her yoyo. ‘How did you get here?’

‘I was at the receiving end of my own Akuma. It happens sometimes.’

‘This ends now!’

‘Of course it does. Let’s make a deal, dear child.’

She paused. ‘What do you want?’

‘I want to get out of here as much as you do.’ He walked around the room, backing her into a corner near the stairs. His cape whispered as it slid over the stone floor. 

Behind him, the window reflected the different parts of the room.

‘What do we have to do?’

‘It’s what you are going to do,’ said Hawkmoth. ‘You’re going to bring me the heart of Adrien Agreste.’

Bile rose in Ladybug’s throat. She swallowed hard, trying to keep from embarrassing herself. ‘How is that going to help?’

‘You’re a clever girl. You figure it out.’ Hawkmoth turned to the window—or mirror, as it seemed to be.

Ladybug raised her yoyo hand.

Hawkmoth tilted his head at her reflection. ‘If you betray me, I will destroy you and everything you care for.’

‘Adrien _is_ all I care for!’

A smile crept across his face. ‘So I am aware. You have until tomorrow morning, Ladybug. I would suggest a walk in the forest as dusk.’

Ladybug ran until the stone and marble beneath her feet gave away to pine needles.

She dropped by a log and was violently sick. Gasping and panting, she whispered, ‘Tikki, spots off.’

The transformation remained.

‘Spots off!’

Ladybug rolled onto her back and stared at the forest canopy. ‘Damn it, spots off! I need you, Tikki!’

A bird whistled nearby.

Another answered it.

_I would suggest a walk in the forest at dusk…_

He knew. Hawkmoth knew.

This was exactly why she had insisted that she and Chat Noir never reveal their identities. And Adrien was still going to suffer for her revealing their companionship—

She blushed. No, her infatuation. Even though she did her best to stay away from him when transformed. Only an idiot wouldn’t notice their mutual blushes and stammers.

‘What would Tikki say?’ Ladybug sat up and stared at her feet. ‘What would Maman and Papa say?’

Eat. They would tell her to eat until her emotions were settled.

The sun had almost completely set by the time she had stolen food from the castle’s well-stocked kitchen.

Ladybug stood and looked into the darkening courtyard. Her hands no longer trembled, but she had yet to come up with a plan.

A window opened overhead.

Adrien sat in the window and stared up at the stars. He wrapped a red cape around his shoulders.

Ladybug took a deep breath and climbed the walls of the castle. ‘Hey, Sunshine.’

He stammered and blushed. ‘H-h-hey, Ladybug. Are you kidnapping me?’

‘Only if I have your consent.’

‘You have no idea. My, uh, guardian had me harvest and feed his butterflies. You wouldn’t believe how messy they are.’

Ladybug gave a shrill laugh. ‘Sounds like you’re ready for some fun?’

‘Yes, please!’ He swung both legs out of the room and jumped out.

‘Careful!’ Ladybug caught him in her arms and threw the yoyo. Between the architecture and the trees, they landed safely in the forest.

‘That was so cool.’ Adrien adjusted the waistcoat covering his white blouse. ‘Do you have any place special you want to go?’

‘Not particularly. Do you?’

He leaned in close. ‘Anywhere’s heaven with you, My Lady.’ He winked.

Ladybug’s face was on fire. She had half a mind to jump in the well and not come out until the next fairy tale. Disney movie. They were following Disney-specific plots.

Even if _The Little Mermaid_ had more closely followed the Broadway version.

Adrien bowed and offered his arm to Ladybug.

She took it.

They walked together through the forest, Ladybug listening to Adrien’s chatter with half of her usual attention.

Once they were further into the woods, Adrien stopped and said, ‘Sorry, I didn’t pay attention to where we were going.’

Ladybug smiled. ‘It’s okay. All I have to do is climb a tree and know which direction to head in.’

Adrien took both of her hands. ‘You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Ladybug. I’m sorry that it took Hawkmoth to bring us together, but I can’t hate even him for this.’

Ladybug tried to smile, to stay fixated on Adrien’s smiling face.

A white butterfly floated through the gloom.

‘What’s wrong?’ said Adrien.

A purple and black butterfly settled on the leaf behind him.

‘Hawkmothaskedmetobringhimyourheart!’

Adrien gaped. ‘What?’

Tears gathered in Ladybug’s eyes. ‘Hawkmoth told me to bring him-to bring him your heart, that he’ll destroy everyone I care about if I don’t. You have to run away! Go away and don’t come back!’

She pushed him into a clump of trees and stared at the black butterfly.

The butterfly’s antennae twitched and flew towards her.

_The sweet smell of despair. Go to her, my little Akuma, and evilize her!_

Ladybug took a deep breath and threw her yoyo.

Adrien ran until he fell. He pulled himself up and ran more and more until he collapsed on the forest floor. He lay there, panting, face first in the dirt. His sides hurt.

Hawkmoth wanted him dead, wanted his heart.

Hawkmoth wanted to use Ladybug to kill him.

He stuck his parched tongue out and wondered where he could get some water.

Why did Hawkmoth hate him?

Adrien sat up and rested his elbows on his knees. Did Hawkmoth know his identity?

He swiped at the tears on his cheeks. How much did Hawkmoth hate them to have Ladybug kill him?

Something tickled his toes.

He opened his eyes and saw a robin poking at his foot.

‘Do you know the story?’

The robin cocked its head and looked at him with its bright eyes.

Adrien reached into his skirt pockets and pulled out the remains of a piece of bread. ‘Robins are good luck if you feed them, right? Or is that magpies?’

The bird pecked at the bread before flying into the tree. It sang several clear notes.

Squirrels, deer, and other woodland animals emerged from the shadows of the forest and gathered around the boy with the bright blond hair.

Adrien looked at them. ‘If this is another Disney movie, maybe you’ll be able to help me. I’m lost and can’t go home. Do any of you know where would be a safe place to stay? Not for long; just until the Akuma reveals herself and Ladybug and I can escape.’

A pair of squirrels bounded over to him, tails and ears twitching.

A doe set her head on his shoulder and nudged him.

The quail make a scolding sound.

Together, they worked together and made him stand up. They led him through the woods, along a faint path, and to a clearing in the deepest part of the forest.

‘A cottage!’ Adrien shivered. ‘The dwarves’ cottage. Of course!’

He scampered down the gentle incline and tried the door of the cottage.

Instead of the dirty space of the Disney movie, everything was neat and tidy. The smell of fresh bread lingered in the air.

The doe pushed the door open a little further and went inside.

Adrien put a hand on her back and went inside as well.

Everything seemed well enough. The furniture was small but not dwarf sized. A covered dish contained Camembert. Stacks and stacks of Camembert filled the cupboards.

‘Plagg would have loved this.’ He sniffled at the thought of the kwami.

In one cupboard, he found fresh bread and two sausages beneath a covered dish.

His stomach gurgled at the smell of the heavily spiced sausages.

Adrien took a dainty knife and cut off a third of each. Guilt gnawed at his conscience but not as much as his empty belly.

In the loft upstairs, he found a small but perfectly comfortable bed on a raised platform, the better keep above the mice. Nineteen of the smallest beds he had ever seen, each barely larger than a match box, stood lined up on the windowsills.

He looked at the squirrels which had followed him. ‘Just a few minutes.’ He yawned. ‘Then I’ll head out. Don’t want to be too close to the castle.’

Ladybug crouched beneath the giant rose window. Her heart pounded in her chest.

With a grunt, she jumped through the rose window and rolled to a stop in the middle of Hawkmoth’s lair. She threw the bag containing the heart of a wild boar (bought off of a hunter making his way home) at his feet. ‘I hope you’re happy.’

He nudged the bag with his foot. ‘Excellent.’

‘I saw to your little present as well.’ She opened her fist.

The crushed remains of a butterfly scattered on the breeze.

‘This really is excellent,’ said Hawkmoth with a chuckle. ‘I’ll remember this for the next time we meet, Ladybug. Now, where is his ring?’

A chill ran down Ladybug’s spine. Ring? ‘I didn’t see a ring.’

‘You fool! He wears a silver ring on his right hand. Surely you’ve seen it.’

Ladybug frowned. He was right, but she didn’t remember seeing the ring on Adrien’s hand, not when they left for their walk. ‘It wasn’t there.’

‘Where did you leave his body?’

Ladybug gulped. ‘Where no one will ever find it again.’

Hawkmoth straightened his shoulders and glared at her. Get it. Find it. And when you do, bring it and the body to which it belongs with you. I want to know that he’s truly gone.’

‘Yes, sir.’

Ladybug jumped through the open window and sank down into the grassy area.

‘Mirror, Mirror, on the wall,’ said Hawkmoth, ‘where is Emilie's son, fairest of all?’

She looked up and saw the window had taken on a liquid look.

A cool voice said, ‘Asleep in a bed, deep in the wood, rests the boy better than good.’

Hawkmoth snorted.

Ladybug watched as a white butterfly flew through the window and into the night sky.

An owl hooted somewhere.

She stood up and crept through the darkness to the darkest park of the wood. Time to let the Ladybug instincts take over.

Adrien woke up to a knocking at the front door. Sunshine streamed through the cracks in the shutters of the little wooden house.

He tumbled out of the bed and downstairs. With a mighty yawn, he forced the bolt on the door open and looked out. ‘Can I help you?’

A hunched-over woman with broken teeth and a battered hat leaned on a gnarled stick. ‘Morning, young man! I’m a peddler passing through and thought you might be interested in some new combs I have in me stock.’

‘Oh, thanks,’ said Adrien, ‘but I don’t have any money.’

‘Nonsense! You can try it out and—’ The old woman sniffed. ‘Is that Camembert?’

Adrien nodded.

‘Oh, goody.’ The peddler rubbed her hands together. ‘Nothing I love so much as well ripened Camembert. Now, you try that out. If you like it well enough, you can give me a wheel of Camembert and we’ll call it even Stevens.’

‘S-sure.’ Adrien went to the kitchen and collected a wheel of cheese. Even if he didn’t like the comb, it would be nice to get the worst of the tangles from his hair.

He returned with the tidily-wrapped wheel of cheese. ‘May I see the comb?’

The peddler opened a pouch and pulled out a brilliant green comb. ‘There you go, m’boy! Same shade as yer eyes.’

‘Thanks.’ Adrien took it and started working on the snarls in his hair.

The peddler chewed on her lower lip as she watched the boy start at the ends and work his way to his scalp.

As soon as the comb touched his scalp, Adrien collapsed to the floor. The comb remained snarled in his hair.

The peddler knelt down and touched Adrien’s forehead. In a lower, deeper tone than before, she said, ‘Just as I planned. Everyone knows the trap involving the apple, but few remember the ribbons and the combs.’

She threw Adrien over her shoulder and scurried off into the woods.

Ladybug walked into the clearing and gasped. ‘Adrien!’

On the opposite side of the clearing, Gabriel Agreste stumbled out of the trees. His gaze swept the scene. He ran straight to the glass coffins in the middle.

Ladybug collapsed beside the coffin closest to her. She pressed a hand to the glass. ‘Adrien!’

He lay on his back, eyes closed, dressed all in white.

‘Oh, Emilie,’ whispered Gabriel.

Ladybug pulled herself to a standing position. She looked at the other coffin and recognised Emilie Agreste from Adrien’s pictures.

‘Well, well, isn’t this a tragic sight.’

They looked to the other side of the clearing.

A figure in a purple suit and silver cowl lounged on top of a mausoleum. She stretched and jumped down, swinging the cane to rest over her shoulders. ‘I wondered if this would bring you here.’

Gabriel sank to the ground, his face completely drained of colour. ‘H-h-h—?’

‘How?’ The suited figure smirked at them. ‘Hawkmoth wasn’t exactly wise when giving me my powers. How does it feel to lose so much, Mr Agreste? Has your world been ripped out from under your feet enough yet?’

Ladybug said, ‘Are you the one who made Mrs Agreste disappear?’

The Akuma laughed and posed with her cane. ‘Oh, no. She did that to herself long before I came on the scene. But you, I have a couple of bones to pick you as well, Ladybug. It’s so convenient to watch two the people I hate the most suffer at the same time.’

‘Release them,’ said Gabriel in a raspy tone. ‘Whatever you ask, whatever you want, I’ll give it to you. Just release them.’

Hawkuma Matata shook her head. ‘Doesn’t work like that.’ She pulled a watch from her waistcoat. ‘And time’s ticking.’

Ladybug looked around, just as if she had received a Lucky Charm. She pushed the glass case off of Adrien and leaned over. Gently, carefully, she kissed his cheek and stepped back.

Nothing happened.

She looked over her shoulder.

Gabriel kneeled beside his wife’s coffin, his head pressed against the glass.

‘Please, Adrien,’ whispered Ladybug. She kissed his lips. ‘For me.’

He breathed a little more deeply.

‘This is embarrassing.’ Akuma Matata swung her leg and rolled onto her back. ‘You’re out of balance, Ladybug.’

Ladybug glared at her. ‘I’m giving him everything I have.’

The Akuma tilted her head. ‘Are you?’

‘You mock my pain!’

The forest tilted.

Akuma Matata held up a hand. ‘Not a Disney movie.’

The forest settled back to its peaceful self.

She slipped off of the mausoleum and strolled across the grass. ‘How does it feel to have no control, Mr Agreste?’

Gabriel clenched his hands and slammed them against the ground.

‘It’s all in your head. Nothing is what it seems to be.’

The designer jumped up and tackled the Akuma.

Ladybug covered Adrien’s body with hers as the adults fought.

 _Out of balance_ …

‘Tikki,’ she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, ‘spots off.’

The light flashed.

Marinette kissed Adrien again, remembering his smile, the way he made her laugh. The way her heart felt like it would leap out of her chest whenever he stood too close.

Adrien’s eyes flew open. ‘Marinette?’

She giggled. ‘I guess the brave little princess is coming to the rescue.’

He smoothed a piece of hair behind her ear. ‘I guess this makes me the damsel in distress, huh?’

The ground tilted and threw them into a glowing abyss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Challenge Time: Whoever correctly guesses the next Disney movie/chapter gets a cameo based on your user name*. 
> 
> *flowersandsunshine, sorry, but you don't qualify as we've discussed the story enough to give you an unfair advantage ;)
> 
> Edit: I should have mentioned: One guess per person :)
> 
> Ouch...second edit: Hint: The princess saves herself in this one.


	4. Enchanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to New York...I'll show myself out. 
> 
> Yes, Disney never crowned Giselle and made her an official princess. This is simply because they made the cheap (and fiscally sound) decision to not pay for lifetime rights to Amy Adams' features. She's a parody princess, which makes her all the better for the narrative.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos to MerakiMela for guessing the basis of this chapter! I'll do a couple more challenges after Chapter 6.

Chat Noir jumped out of the manhole and looked around. ‘Wha—where am I?’

Several construction workers stared at him.

‘What the—?’ said one of them.

Adrien ran up to the men. He leaned on his baton. ‘I seek a beautiful lady. My life partner, my one coquette, the answer to my love’s duet!’

The construction worker stammered, ‘I-I’d like to find one of them, too, you know?’

Another construction worker said, ‘Shit, they weren’t kidding; the French really are that eloquent.’

Chat Noir snapped to attention. ‘The French?’

‘Dude, you’re in New York City.’ The construction worker eyed the hero’s suit. ‘Isn’t it a little early in the evening for black leather?’

‘New York City?’ Chat Noir stared in wonder at the sight of Times Square. ‘I’ve always wanted to visit New York City.’ He took a deep breath. ‘ _N-Y-C—_ ’

A police officer blew his whistle. ‘Do you have a licence for costumed singing in Times Square, young man?’

Chat Noir’s ears drooped. ‘Er, no? Do I need one?’

‘Tourists.’ The officer wrote out a citation. ‘Worse with every movie.’

‘But I’m Chat Noir! I fight with Ladybug! You can’t give me—’ Chat Noir groaned and looked at the piece of paper shoved into his hand, ‘a ticket.’

He looked at the citation and felt all of his excitement draining out of him.

‘We have enough hero problems here,’ said the officer. ‘Go back to Paris, you frog.’

Chat Noir gaped. ‘I’m not a frog!’

The officer seemed to grow even bigger, his face turning red. ‘Get out of here before I haul you down to the station!’

The hero whimpered and scampered off into the crowd.

He worked his way through the busy pavement, looking for an empty alley to transform. They were all full of people.

‘Oof! Watch it!’

Chat Noir caught the arm of the person he had run into. ‘I’m sorry.’ He gave a half-hearted smile. ‘I wasn’t paying attention.’

The well-dressed New Yorker patted him arm. ‘You’re okay. Great Chat Noir costume, by the way! You should stop by _And Sew It Begins_. My friend runs it and would love to see your costume.’

Grasping for any sort of friendliness, Chat Noir said, ‘What’s that?’

‘It’s a sewing shop in the Garment District.’

Chat Noir beamed a full 10,000 watt smile at her. ‘Thank you for your help—?’

‘MerakiMela. Tell her I sent you.’

‘Pleasure to meet you, MerakiMela.’

They waved and continued on the street.

Chat Noir stood with his hands on his hips. ‘Excellent. Now I just have to…’ He looked around. ‘How do I get to the Garment District?’

He pulled out his baton and looked up directions.

Twenty minutes, three photobombs, and several rebukes from New Yorkers later, he tripped over construction material and sprawled in front of a shop.

‘Is this for not saving some of the Camembert from Snow White?’ He started to pick himself up when a delicate bell tinkled.

A familiar voice yelped as her foot tripped over him.

Chat Noir sprang up and caught the young woman. His green eyes widened. ‘Marinette?’

She squinted before staring at him. ‘Chat? What are you doing here?’

‘Waiting for you to fall for me, obviously.’ He winked.

She rolled her eyes and stood carefully. ‘What are you doing in New York? Who’s protecting Paris?’

‘Well, you see, Princess, there was this Akuma.’

Marinette pinched the bridge of her nose. ‘Say no more. Akuma Matata?’

‘Yeah!’ Chat Noir mentally patted himself on the back for not mentioning seeing her in the other episodes. Now was not the time for an identity reveal. ‘You heard it?’

‘Er, um, Ladybug mentioned it to me!’ Her brows knit. ‘She’s looking everywhere for you. I-I think she’s worried for you.’

Chat Noir’s face turned dreamy. ‘My Lady is worried for me?’

Marinette resisted the urge to gag. ‘She’ll be glad you’re here. Have you seen Adrien Agreste or his father? I saw them both for a little while but not since getting here.’

Chat Noir started to nod before shaking his head. ‘How did you end up here?’

Marinette stared down a group of teens staring at her and Chat Noir, watching them until they disappearing around the corner of the building. ‘My roommate, at least, I think they’re my roommate, MerakiMela, said I was going to be late for work this morning.’

She frowned and scrunched her nose. ‘The weird thing is, yesterday morning, I climbed out of a manhole in the middle of Times Square. I’m not even sure how I found the apartment, but I did.’

‘What matters is that we found each other.’ Chat Noir put a hand on her shoulder. ‘I’ll walk you home, if that’s okay. It’s getting dark.’

‘Thanks, Kitty.’

They took the subway to her apartment, pressed unusually close to each other amidst the rush hour traffic.

As they climbed the steps to Marinette’s apartment, Chat Noir panted and said, ‘I think it’d just be easier to use my baton at this rate.’

‘Yeah, but the neighbours would talk.’

‘You’re bringing home a guy dressed like a cat. How much more can they gossip about?’

‘Touché.’ She slipped the key into its lock and threw open the door.

Chat Noir followed her into the house.

MerakiMela sat on the couch, inhaling a take-out dinner. ‘Hey, Stitch.’

Marinette rolled her eyes. ‘Don’t start with the puns.’ She did a double-take. ‘Are you eating French Fries with chopsticks?’

‘All the silverware is dirty. You missed me eating the salad and hamburger. Hey, Chat, you look skinny. There’s extra. Eat up.’

Chat Noir dropped onto the floor by the ottoman. ‘I can has cheezburger?’ He flashed his most adorable smile.

MerakiMela laughed. ‘I like this one.’

‘He’s a stray,’ said Marinette. ‘I just need to get him back to his owners.’

‘Pretty sure the bell says otherwise, Stitch.’

Chat Noir frowned and swallowed the massive bite of the cheeseburger. ‘I don’t seam to get it.’

‘Yarn knot going to find your answers here.’ MerakiMela winked.

‘Darn you! I seam to have lost the thread of the conversation.’

‘Hey, Chat?’ said Marinette. ‘Button it.’

He fell over, a hand pressed to his chest. ‘Princess! You’ve wounded me.’

‘Don’t worry.’ MerakiMela swallowed a bite of food. ‘ _She’s been dreaming of a true loves kiss._ ’

Chat Noir’s ears twitched. ‘Oh, has she?’

Marinette said, ‘When you meet the someone who was meant for you, ‘fore two can become one, there is something you must do.’

‘Do you pull each other’s tails?’ Chat Noir tugged on her pigtails.

‘Chat, we all know of your crush on Ladybug.’

He sighed and rested his chin on his fist. ‘ _It’s true. I've been dreaming of a true love's kiss/ And a princess I'm hoping comes with this. That's what brings ever-aftering so happy…_ ’

‘A princess?’ MerakiMela side-eyed Marinette. ‘Doesn’t he usually call Ladybug “my lady”.’

Chat Noir blushed. ‘It-it-it was because—because I was looking at Marinette, my Princess. Freudian slip and all.’

‘Sure, sure.’

He stood up and brushed the crumbs from his clothes. ‘ _And that's the reason we need lips so much, For lips are the only things that touch. So to spend a life of endless bliss just find who you love through true love's kiss_.’

Marinette rolled her eyes. ‘Come on, _chaton_. There’s more room on the balcony.’

‘Stay safe, kids!’

Once Chat Noir was safely onto the fire escape, Marinette slammed the window shut. ‘Of all the busy-body shipping roommates!’

‘Sorry if I offended you, Marinette.’

She sat down next to him, their backs pressing against the brick of the building. ‘It’s okay. It’s just been really stressful.’

He put an encouraging hand on her shoulder. ‘I can imagine.’

Marinette reached over and rubbed behind his ears, right where he liked it. ‘You have no idea.’

The construction workers had yet to finish discussing the events of the day before when a bubbling and hissing came from the manhole they were supposed to finish.

Being admirable persons of average intellect, they gathered around the hostile sounding hole and stared into it.

A moment later, a giant purple creature shot into the air. It screamed at the lights of Times Square. Two minutes later, ominous chanting with a heavy bass filled the air.

The construction workers scrambled away as Hawkmoth rose up, head bowed, hands planted on his cane, in the best of villain fashions.

‘Come, my little Akuma,’ he rasped. ‘Let us find Ladybug and Chat Noir to end this madness!’

As they walked through the park, Marinette said, ‘But what if we can’t find Ladybug?’

‘Then we’ll defeat the Akuma together.’ Chat Noir walked along confidently, restored by a good night’s sleep on the couch. ‘I’ve seen you in a scuffle. You’re not Ladybug but you can definitely hold your own.’

Marinette shook her head as they reached a bridge.

Chat Noir leaned over a railing and watched the ducks go by. ‘I just wish she knew that I was serious.’

‘Serious about what?’ Marinette stepped up onto the railing, locking her feet against the metal.

‘How much I love her.’ He sighed.

‘But you flirt with everyone.’

‘No I don’t!’

‘Yes, you do! You’d probably flirt with a signpost if it promised to give you a hug or head scratches.’

He pouted. ‘I’m serious.’

‘Yes, but, _How does she know that you love her? How does she know she’s yours?_ ’ Marinette’s hand flew to cover her mouth.

Chat Noir’s lips formed a satisfied grin. ‘What was that, Princess?’

She scowled and walked off.

‘Hey! Princess! I’m only teasing.’

As Marinette marched through Central Park, she muttered, ‘ _It’s not enough to take the one you love for granted. You must remind her or she’ll be inclined to say—_ ’

She gasped as Chat Noir hung upside down from a tree, his face centimetres from hers. ‘Don’t you have your own unrequited love, Princess?’

Marinette pushed him aside. ‘ _How do I know he loves me? How do I know he’s mine?_ ’

She looked over her shoulder.

‘ _He’ll find a new way to show you a little bit every day._ ’

Marinette started back as Chat Noir danced up to her, a sunflower clenched in his teeth. ‘ _That’s how you know, That’s how you know he is your love._ ’

He stopped and stared before shouting, ‘Ladybug!’

‘Where?’ Marinette ran after him.

Chat Noir vaulted over the railings of a bridge and dropped onto the path below. He took a deep breath and belted, ‘ _I’ve been dreaming—_ ’

His impromptu solo resulted in a five bike pile-up.

Overhead, Marinette winced even as she giggled. ‘You okay, Chat?’

A skinny arm with attached hand shuffled out of the pile and gave a thumbs up.

‘Dumb cat.’ She watched as he extracted himself from the pile and helped fix the bikes, apologizing profusely to the riders.

When Chat Noir landed on the railing beside her, she said, ‘I take it you didn’t see Ladybug?’

‘Nope.’ His ears and tail drooped.

Marinette put a hand on his shoulder. ‘You’ll find her; don’t worry.’

‘I know.’ He smiled at her. ‘But we’re in New York. It’s so big! What if she’s somewhere like Queens or—or—or—where is Captain America from?’

‘Brooklyn.’

‘Yeah, Brooklyn. Or Manhattan.’

‘We’re in Manhattan.’

‘Oh, yeah. Guess it’s just not my day.’

An ice cream cart rolled by.

Marinette linked her arm through his. ‘Let’s get some ice cream. That’ll make you feel better.’

Chat Noir brightened. ‘Thanks.’

They sat with their backs to a tree and watched the people going about their business.

Slowly, Chat Noir worked his way to a horizontal position on his back, smiling into the sunshine warming his face. Whenever Marinette’s fingers found his hair, a steady purr rumbled in his chest.

Marinette rummaged in her purse, wishing once again that she could find Tikki. Instead, she found two tickets for a fancy dress ball that night. ‘Hey, Chat?’

‘Yeah?’ he said in a drowsy voice.

‘Would you like to be my plus one to a ball tonight? As friends, not dates!’

He rolled onto his stomach and smiled at her. ‘A ball in New York? With my Princess?’ He kissed her hand. ‘How could I refuse?’

The ball was perfect. The costumes astounding.

As he waltzed about the room, Chat Noir thought it a pity he had met Marinette after Ladybug. _If only…_

He shook his head to clear away the song. Wrong chapter. But like any good mind worm, it only grew stronger the more he tried to not think about it. 

Especially since Marinette had thrown together a Ladybug inspired costume in just a few hours: A spotted dress with a full skirt, a mask, and a dotted gossamer shawl which reminded him of wings.

‘You look happy, Chat,’ said Marinette as they navigated the room.

‘You could say I’m paw-sitively pleased with how tonight’s going. Great company, great food, and a quintet that actually knows the pieces it’s playing.’

Marinette giggled. ‘Sounds like you’ve been to your fair share of disappointing formal events.’

‘You have no idea, My Lady.’

They froze at his words.

‘I mean! I mean!’ Chat Noir pulled at his collar.

Marinette stared at him with wide eyes.

‘You remind me of Ladybug! _What is it about you/ That’s so wonderfully, impossibly_ —?’

She covered his mouth with her hand. ‘No, don’t finish that.’

‘And the way you’re dressed tonight, it just—’

The doors of the elevator slid open. Purple smoke spilled into the ballroom.

A giant creature shot into the room and perched one of the chandeliers.

People screamed and ran for cover.

‘Is that—is that a giant butterfly?’ said Chat Noir, staring.

Marinette forced her mouth shut. ‘I think it is.’

It flapped its wings, forcing people to their knees.

Hakmoth strode out of the elevator, his face the very definition of smug. ‘Ladybug! Chat Noir! I have you now!’

‘He just had to ruin it,’ said Marinette. ‘Chat?’

‘Already on it.’ He ran around the room.

‘Stay still, you dratted cat!’

Chat Noir bounced around the room. ‘BadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadger,’ he chanted, managing to just stay out of Hawkmoth’s reach.

‘Stay! Still!’ grunted Hawkmoth.

Marinette ran up the stairs and looked for anything resembling a yoyo. She may not have Tikki, but she could still help her partner!

‘Give me your Miraculous!’ bellowed Hawkmoth.

Chat Noir cradled his right hand and sang, ‘ _Never gonna give you up! Never gonna let—_ ’

Hawkmoth ran a hand over his face. ‘I do know what Rick Rolling is. My son is obsessed with internet culture.’

‘Oh, really?’ Chat Noir posed like Willy Wonka. ‘So you know one meme and suddenly you’re an expert?’

‘Akuma Matata! Finish this pest!’

‘Yes, Hawkmoth.’ Akuma Matata flew to the floor and stretched. ‘If I’m to succeed I’ll need a story for when I go back to Paris. What about “a giant, dangerous Akuma appeared and killed everyone, and poor Ladybug and Chat Noir just couldn’t save them!”’

The butterfly eyed Chat Noir. ‘Let’s start with the boy who started it all.’

Marinette jumped in front of Chat Noir. ‘Over my dead body!’

Akuma Matata shrugged. ‘All right; I’m flexible.’

‘No!’ cried Hawkmoth. ‘No killing.’ He opened the empathetic link and tried to connect, to give pain as he had to Evilillustrator.

The Akuma crossed her arms and smiled. ‘Tired of failure yet?’

Hawkmoth growled. ‘How are you resisting this?’

‘It’s a parallel world related to fairy tales.’ The Akuma transformed into a woman in a flowing black dress. ‘Your power means nothing here.’

Hawkmoth bellowed, ‘You played me!’

Akuma Matata studied her nails and smiled coyly. ‘Like the cheap kazoo that you are, Monsieur.’

‘Mm, watcha say?’ whispered Marientte.

Chat Noir sniggered.

Hawkmoth tried to call the butterfly back.

The Akuma took his cane and kicked him into the elevator.

The doors closed on him with a scheerful _ding!_

‘Now,’ said Akuma Matata, turning her attention to the heroes, ‘let’s see what you two are really made of.’

Chat Noir extended his baton and charged the Akuma.

Marinette looked around for something to in lieu of her yoyo. A Lucky Charm would be even better.

A crash rocked the room.

She turned and saw Chat Noir on his back.

Akuma Matata pressed the cane into Chat Noir’s chest, pinning him to the floor. ‘We’re coming to the end of our story now. Are you at the edge of your seat, Chat Noir? Just dying to know how it ends?’

‘How about this!’

A flower pot crashed against the Akuma’s shoulder.

She hissed as she whipped about.

Marinette crossed her arms. ‘And they all live happily ever after!’

Hakuma Matata gave a satisfied smile. ‘Well, at least I did.’ She shoved the cane through Chat Noir’s shoulder.’

‘Chat!’

Chat Noir blinked at the wood sticking through his shoulder. ‘Oh, look at that. I’ve been impaled.’

An icy wind rushed through the open doors.


	5. Mulan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kwamis have a meeting loosely based on the Ancestors Scene from Mulan. 
> 
> All of the names were pulled form the Miraculous Ladybug wiki. Fingers are crossed that they're correct and up to date: https://miraculousladybug.fandom.com/wiki/Kwamis

Tikki stretched and looked around. ‘The Guardian’s Box?’ She looked around and saw Plagg curled up and sleeping. ‘Plagg. Plagg? Plagg!’

‘Five more minutes,’ he muttered, tucking his nose under his paw.

Tikki jumped on him and rolled him over. ‘Plagg! Wake up the rest of the kwamis!’

He blinked at her. ‘Why can’t you do it?’

‘Because you’re still on probation for the Spanish Flu.’

‘Oh, come on, Sugar Cube! You know that was at least as much Mullo’s fault as mine!’

‘Wake them up now! We have to figure out what’s going on with this Akuma.’

‘Urgh. One kwami reunion coming right up.’ Plagg flew into the centre of the room. He yawned before shouting, ‘Wakey-wakey! Rise and shine, fellow kwamis! We’ve got a big meeting and not a lot of time.’

The different kwamis woke up. Excited noises filled the box as they greeted their brothers and sisters.

Trixx affectionately nibbled on Tikki and Plagg. Barkk herded everyone into a circle, tail wagging excitedly.

‘What brings you here?’ hissed Sass. ‘Where are your Chosen?’

‘Well,’ said Tikki.

‘It’s kind of a funny story,’ said Plagg. ‘See, Ladybug and Chat Noir got hit by an Akuma and now they’re forced to go through different Disney movie plots.’

‘Not just Disney movie plots,’ said Tikki. ‘Ones specifically related to the different princesses.’

‘And my chosen is the princess in every single one so far.’ Plagg fell backwards from cackling.

‘My chosen gets to rescue him each time,’ said Tikki. ‘They’re getting a little tired of it.’

‘How many have they had so far?’ said Wayzz.

‘Four already, and they’re getting more intense,’ said Tikki.

‘The last one was a musical,’ said Plagg.

Tikki rolled her eyes. ‘They’ve all been musicals.’

‘Yeah, but you weren’t transformed for the whole thing.’

‘ _Snow White_ has the weakest songs of the entire Disney franchise!’

‘I was in _Enchanted_!’

‘At least _Enchanted_ is funny! And James Marsden’s hair is to die for.’ Tikki looked embarrassed. ‘I mean, that’s what Ma—my Chosen says.’

‘Calm down,’ said Wayzz. ‘Not is not the time to discuss the finer points of music.’

Sass lisped, ‘Is there anything consistent to them aside from the Akuma’s theme?’

‘Just our Chosens,’ said Tikki.

‘And my Chosen’s father and the Akuma have been in every single one so far,’ said Plagg.

‘Hmm,’ said Fluff, long ears twitching. ‘Have they seen anyone else from their world in these yet?’

Tikki and Plagg shook their heads.

Orikko clucked, ‘Maybe it’s connected to the kwamis?’

Everyone looked at the rooster kwami.

‘Well, two of the three people are Chosens. What if the third human is a Holder as well?’

Plagg growled in the back of his throat. ‘That would mean he has either Nooroo or Duusu. And he lives in the same house as Chat Noir.’

Stompp scratched its long horns. ‘It wouldn’t be the first time Chosens have hidden themselves from each other and lived in close proximity.’

‘Except that Hawkmoth is trying to take Chat Noir’s Miraculous.’

‘Do we know why yet?’ said Xuppu, the monkey kwami.

Tikki shook her head. 

‘Hm, perhaps it would be best to investigate this further.’

‘Poor Nooroo,’ said Pollen. ‘He really has such awful luck with his holders.’

Trixx said, ‘And he’s not even the kwami of Bad Luck.’

‘At least my Miraculous never got Akumatised,’ said Plagg, bristling.

Pollen glared at him. ‘Says the kwami who set off Mount Vesuvius because of eating too much cheese!’

‘Well, I’m sorry! We can’t all be Robin Hood or Cleopatra!’

‘I thought she was a Ladybug holder?’ said Daizzi, snout twitching.

‘I think that was Boudica,’ said Barkk.

Ziggy the goat-kwami shook its head. ‘No, I was with her then.’

‘Then who had Ladybug in the first century B.C.E.?’

They all looked at Tikki.

She held her paws up to her head. ‘Not the point, everyone! We need to focus on how to help our Chosens get out of the Akuma’s grip so they can cleanse it and restore Paris.’

‘What happens when the world changes?’

Plagg tapped his paw against his nose. ‘The world changes whenever they quote another Disney movie.’

‘What _is_ that?’ chorused several Kwamis.

Tikki and Plagg looked at each other.

‘It’s a—a—’ Tikki scratched her head.

‘Pictures move and speak by themselves,’ said Plagg.

‘Oh!’ chorused the kwamis.

‘Disney,’ said Tikki, ‘is the person who makes the movies. He steals stories from around the world and makes money from it.’

Sass shook his head. ‘Ridiculous.’

Daizzi snorted. ‘Nothing’s ever gone right since humans first thought up globalization.’

The kwamis shook their heads and murmured in agreement.

‘Ooh!’ said Trixx, spinning in a circle. ‘Do you think it’s related to people who are currently holding a Miraculous? What would happen if Pollen, Wayzz, and I were to all go to our different holders right now?’

‘You could try,’ said Tikki. ‘The worst case scenario is that they can’t join and help.’

‘Besides, we don’t even know if the Miraculouses are what is pulling people in,’ said Plagg, rubbing his growling belly. ‘All we do know is that we keep ending up in places completely devoid of cheese!’

Longg, the dragon kwami, said, ‘And where are your Holders now while you are here?’

‘Hopefully invoking another movie.’

Wayzz nodded his head. ‘In the meanwhile, I will speak with Master Fu and arrange for Pollen, Trixx, and myself to be delivered to the other holders.’

‘What about the rest of us?’ said Sass.

‘Based on our current evidence and hypothesis,’ said Wayzz, ‘it would seem you must already have bonded and connected to the Miraculous.’

‘So no getting out of the Box?’ said Roaar, scratching her ear with her back paw.

‘Not yet. But soon.’

A portal opened up above the box. It sucked Plagg and Tikki onwards and upwards. 


	6. Cinderella

Adrien looked at the bucket in one hand and the wooden clogs on his feet. ‘You have _got_ to be joking.’ He looked down at the sooty paw prints all over the room. ‘Plagg?’

Plagg grunted and rolled over. ‘Help me, Adrien! I can’t levitate!’

Adrien burst out laughing. The handkerchief covering his hair fell off. ‘You’re _fat_! And you have to move on your own!’

Growling, Plagg lumbered across the room. ‘Where are we?’

‘I’m going to guess _Cinderella_ looking at my patched clothes and your,’ he sniggered, ‘sudden weight gain.’

‘Is there an actual cat in this one?’ Plagg licked his paws.

‘His name is Lucifer, he’s the worst, and is always trying to get Cinderella in trouble.’ Adrien gave the kwami a very pointed look. ‘I wonder who that could be based off.’

Plagg stuck his nose in the air. ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about. I was nowhere near Burbank, California during production in 1948.’

‘Interesting that you know the exact time and location.’

‘You can’t prove anything!’ Plagg ran away. He attempted to, at least. It was more a matter of lumbering away as his squishy belly dragged on the floor and made it difficult to move quickly.

‘Where were you last episode?’

‘Tikki and I were sent to the Quantum Realm and discussed the situation with our fellow kwamis.’

Adrien tilted his head. ‘You mean like the Ancestors in _Mulan_?’

Plagg’s jaw dropped. ‘You mean we got stuck in one of our own? Tikki is never going to let us live this down!’ He looked up at Adrien. ‘You look much skinnier from this angle. You should eat more cheese.’

‘Ugh, no thanks.’

‘Where were you while we were gone?’

A haunted look crossed Adrien’s face. He gulped. ‘You don’t want to know.’

‘Oh-ho-ho! I think I do!’

‘Do you think you could avoid my pain just this once?’

‘Hmm, nope!’

‘This bucket is full of water.’

Plagg squinted at it before retreating to the window.

‘That’s what I thought.’

The front door quavered beneath the pounding of a fist.

‘Aren’t you gonna get that?’ drawled Plagg.

‘Oh, right!’ Adrien skipped across the floor and opened the door. ‘Yes?’

A liveried servant shoved a heavy, cream envelope into his hand before jumping onto a horse and riding off.

Adrien turned the envelope over and looked at it.

‘You should open it,’ said Plagg, twining around Adrien’s ankles.

‘It’s addressed to Father.’

‘All the more reason to read it.’

‘Plagg!’

‘Adrien?’

Adrien shoved Plagg aside and climbed the marble stairs to where his father stood. ‘A message from the king.’

‘Get dressed into something more appropriate. You look like a servant.’

‘Yes, Father.’ Adrien decided not to comment on his father's currant-coloured suit and simply handed over the letter.

Gabriel took the envelope and opened it.

Adrien climbed the stairs as slowly as possible, watching for any hint as to the letter.

‘Are your clothes coming to meet you?’ Gabriel folded the envelope and put it in his inner breast pocket.

‘N-no. I just wanted to know what the letter said.’

‘It’s an invitation to a ball, hosted by Ladybug. We shall not be going.’

‘Why not? She’ll be able to help us get out of here!’

Gabriel winced. ‘Ladybug and Chat Noir will defeat the Akuma as they always do.’ He looked up the stairs at his son. ‘I will listen to you perform your latest piano lesson in twenty minutes. Look presentable by then.’

‘Yes, father.’ Adrien bounded up the stairs. Even if being stuck in this weirdness was—weird, at least he got to spend time with his father!

An hour later, he never wanted to see his father again. Maybe a year. At least a month.

‘…Have you even been practicing? That was the worst you’ve played since—since—’

Adrien didn’t dare finish the sentence, even though he knew his father was trying to say ‘since your mother disappeared’. He stared at the piano keys.

‘You’ll practice until it’s perfect. All night, if you must.’

Adrien looked up, eyes wide. ‘But father! What about the ball?’

‘We don’t leave this house, and you will not attend a ball thrown by a self-appointed superhero who will no doubt attract the attention of the Akuma—and Hawkmoth as well.’ Gabriel placed a hand on his son’s shoulder.

Adrien looked up, his father's action at odds with the words.

‘You have until midnight. I expect it to be perfect.’

‘Yes, father.’ Adrien stared at his hands resting in his lap.

Plagg hissed at the closed door before jumping up and walking across the piano keys. His tail smacked Adrien’s arm. ‘That went well.’

‘Midnight.’ Adrien squished Plagg’s face in his hands. ‘Do you know what that means?’

‘You’re going to ditch practice and go to the ball?’

‘You’ve got it!’

Plagg smiled smugly as his kitten dug through his closets, pulling out any number of suits and formal wear. ‘Don’t forget that Ladybug is hosting the ball.’

‘Do you have the purr-fect addition?’

‘I thought we had agreed that specific pun was to be retired.’ He kicked a pair of shoes—boots, really—from the depths of the closet.

‘Maybe it fancied some air.’ Adrien pulled the shoes on without looking at them.

Plagg settled on the piano by a stack of sheet music. 

Adrien put the finishing touches on his tie and finger-combed his hair to one side. He posed, one hand in his trouser pocket, and looked over his shoulder at the mirror. ‘How do I look?’

‘You look like a model.’ Plagg stretched and yawned, plunking out several discordant notes. ‘Apparently humans of all types are quite attracted to that sort of thing.’

‘Help me get out and I’ll give you five wheels of Camembert when we get home.’

‘Five wheels a day. For a month.’

‘For a week.’

‘Done!’

They shook and Adrien clambered out the window, a dark cloak covering his evening clothes.

Plagg rested his paws against the piano keys and squinted at the sheet music. He muttered a few choice words before picking out the notes which Adrien had struggled with. It was going to be a long five hours.

‘Good evening, monsieur,’ said the butler at the door. ‘Welcome to Ladybug’s masked ball. We’re very happy to have you here.’

Adrien smiled his thanks and tied the offered mask on. He walked down the stairs, one gloved hand on the bannister, watching the people gathered around the floor.

Some of the guests stopped and stared at him as he walked around, the handsome young man without a companion.

At one end of the room, Ladybug curtseyed to the different men and women being introduced. She smiled brightly, but Adrien could tell that she was exhausted. He wanted nothing more than to sweep her away from the crowd and to somewhere safe, somewhere they could be together.

But the receiving line held several dozen people.

What would Plagg do?

Adrien straightened his shoulders, lifted his chin, and marched over to His Lady, radiating the power of one confidant of their station in life. He cut the line and bowed, holding out a gloved hand. ‘My Lady?’

‘Really, Cha—oh!’ She turned from the guest and stared at Adrien. A blush settled over her cheeks. ‘Adrien?’

He looked up and winked at her. ‘Dance with me?’

She looked over the people waiting to meet with her. In the gentlest of whispers, she said, ‘Yes, please.’

‘Excellent.’ Adrien caught her in his arms and swept her out to the dance floor in the best of romantic traditions. Princesses _liked_ being swept off their feet, after all.

If he had been transformed, Ladybug would have told him to wait his turn. If he had been transformed, Ladybug would have raised an eyebrow, tilted her head, and pursed her lips.

He was not Chat Noir. He was Adrien.

Ladybug turned red and watched the ballroom as they waltzed about.

The song came to an end without either having spoken.

The bowed and curtsied to each other.

‘I should—’ Ladybug licked her lips. ‘I should see to the rest of my guests.’

Adrien bit his own lips and lifted Ladybug’s chin to look at him. ‘We’re in _Cinderella_.’

The Ladybug he was familiar with suddenly returned. Her posture sharpened, her eyebrows furrowed. ‘How do you know?’

His hand fell to his side. ‘I saw Chat Noir’s kwami. He turned into a big fat cat, just like in the movie.’

Ladybug’s lips twitched. ‘And?’

He ran a thumbnail over his lower lip. ‘I was told to be home by midnight by my fairy-god-kwami.’

‘Weird, but okay. What else?’

The next dance picked up.

Ladybug dragged Adrien off of the dance floor and onto the cool balcony. In a gentle tone, she said, ‘What else?’

Tears gathered and dripped down his face.

She wiped them away. ‘In your own time.’

He took a deep, shuddering breath. ‘My father locked me in my room.’

Ladybug’s hands gripped his arms. 'What?'

‘He told me that my piano piece had to be perfect or he would never let me out.’ He sniffed. ‘And—’ He tried to laugh, ‘I guess I should have led with this one: When we were deposited here, I was dressed like Cinderella in the movie, in her dress and apron.’

Ladybug pulled him to a bench hidden amongst the shadows and held him as he wept. She rubbed his back and rocked slightly, just enough to comfort him.

As he continued to cry, Ladybug pulled out her yoyo. ‘Lucky Charm.’

The biggest box of tissues she’d ever seen fell into her hand.

‘Here.’ She shoved tissues into his hand.

‘Thanks,’ he said in a congested tone. He blew his nose multiple times before laughing. ‘I must look like an absolute mess.’

‘You look divine.’

‘You must be in love. There’s no reason you could be so blind otherwise.’

Ladybug hesitated. ‘Maybe it is love.’ She took his hand.

He rested his head on her shoulder and sighed. ‘You’re the miracle I’ve been dreaming of.’

‘But does your heart have wings?’

‘Every time I look at you, Princess.’

Ladybug’s gentle smile faltered. ‘I’m sorry you got sucked in to the Akuma.’

He sat up and wiped his eyes. ‘Yeah, it hasn’t been so great.’ He reached out a hand. ‘Except that it hasn’t been all bad.’

‘Er, be glad you missed the last one.’

Adrien winced. ‘Tell me about it.’

Ladybug gave him a suspicious look.

‘I mean, based on what Chat Noir said, it sounds like it was snow laughing matter.’

She groaned. ‘That’d better be a direct quote.’

Adrien crossed his fingers. ‘It certainly was. According to Chat, the snuggle was real.’

Ladybug rubbed her temples. ‘Is that was he said?’

Puns chased the pain away. Adrien leaned in closer. ‘Why so Frost-tea? Maybe you should let it go?’

Ladybug jumped to her feet. ‘That’s it. I am wringing that cat’s neck—Ooph!’ She pulled back from where she had run into Adrien’s chest.

He summoned his best Chat Noir smile. ‘He also said…’

Ladybug stared, transfixed.

‘He also said that he _gloves—_ ’

The clock chimed.

They jumped and stared at the clock. Midnight.

‘I have to go.’ Adrien ran.

‘Wait!’

‘No time, Princess!’ He sprinted even faster.

Ladybug shed her large skirts to reveal her normal costume and yo-yoed after him.

Even with her superpowers, she was too slow.

All that remained on the steps was a leather boot with a green paw print on the bottom. 

She stooped and picked up the boot. She studied it before looking out into the darkness. ‘Impossible.’

Adrien climbed through his bedroom window and landed heavily on his shoulder. ‘Ow.’

A few piano keys plinked. A heavy weight landed on the piano bench before jumping onto the floor. ‘Your father was here. Madder than a March Hare to find you asleep.’

‘Just my luck.’ Adrien rubbed his shoulder before lighting the lamp by his bed. ‘Wait, asleep?’

‘Rigged up your bed to make it look like you were asleep and provided enough breathing to make it sound like you were asleep.’ Plagg scratched under his chin with his back paw.

He meowed loudly as Adrien scooped him up and hugged him.

‘Just this once, you bring me luck.’

Plagg twisted around and climbed onto Adrien’s shoulder. ‘Sure, you’re welcome. How was dancing with Ladybug?’

‘Great. Until I started crying.’ Adrien threw himself face-first into the pillows on his bed. ‘How could she even look at me after this?’

‘She’ll manage.’ Plagg curled up on his Chosen’s back and tucked his tail beneath his chin. ‘Did you figure out what story this is?’

‘ _Cinderella_.’

‘Ah, good old Folktale Type 510A. I wondered.’

‘Wh-what?’ Adrien sniffed.

‘Go to sleep. Once your Princess finds you—’

Adrien sat up. ‘Ladybug is My Lady. Marinette is Princess. Why do you keep calling her that?’

Plagg licked a ruffled bit of fur. ‘Because you do.’

‘I do?’

‘Go to sleep, kid. Things will be better in the morning.’

Once Adrien fell asleep, Plagg curled up on his Chosen’s chest and plotted.

Adrien woke up with a pounding headache and immediately set to work on practicing his piano piece. Breakfast could wait.

His father arrived shortly after eight and listened to the performance.

As he played, Adrien snuck a look at his father. Music recitals were the only time his father’s features relaxed. It was like looking at a different person.

He kept his eyes on the sheet music, desperate to be done practicing forever.

Someone pounded at the door.

‘Open in the Name of Ladybug!’ called a footman.

‘Continue playing,’ said Gabriel.

Adrien started from the last phrase but stopped when the pounding began again.

Gabriel muttered a curse and stood up. ‘Stay here. I expect you to pick up exactly where we left off.’

As soon as his father left, Adrien crept down the stairs and stared from the balcony to the foyer below.

Two soldiers pushed Gabriel aside, allowing Ladybug to enter the house.

She held a leather boot in one hand. ‘I’m looking for the owner of this shoe.’

Adrien gulped at the sight of the green paw print on the shoe's sole.

Gabriel stared at the shoe before studying Ladybug. ‘And what brings you to our home?’

‘Every young man in the land is trying on the shoe,’ she said in an even tone. Her shoulders remained straight as she stared down the designer. ‘I understand you have a son who is in the right age bracket.’

‘I prefer he did not try on the shoe.’

Ladybug tilted her head. ‘Why?’

Adrien grinned at the challenge.

Gabriel’s eyes narrowed. ‘Very well. Adrien?’

Adrien waited an appropriate amount of time before appearing on the steps. ‘Yes, Father?’

Ladybug winked at him. ‘Hello, Adrien. Would you try this shoe on?’

‘Anything for you, Prin—My Lady!’

He took the shoe and tried to pull it on.

It was stuck.

Ladybug frowned and studied Adrien. ‘I was so sure.’

‘Apparently you were wrong,’ said Gabriel. ‘Now, if you’ll—’

‘Wait!’ Adrien removed his thick woollen socks and pulled the shoe on. He grinned bashfully at Ladybug. ‘It’s a perfect fit.’

‘It is you!’ Ladybug stared in wonder.

Gabriel pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Must your happily ever after be so sickening?’

Adrien grinned at Ladybug. ‘You know what they say: If it’s not Baroque, don’t fix it!’

Everyone covered their ears as a roaring filled the space.

‘You fool of a cat!’ screamed Ladybug. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, new challenge: Where are our love birds off to next? One guess per person. The next chapter is a good one for guessing because there are crowd scenes for days, so the more who accurately guess the better!


	7. Beauty and the Beast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of four letter words for this chapter and none of them are 'good', especially since my crowd scenes disappeared.

Adrien squinted into the early morning sunlight and shivered. A long apron covered the front of his blue trousers and white shirt.

Behind him, a cosy home sat covered in vines. Smoke poured from its eccentric chimney.

Muttering and the odd curse came from the second floor.

‘It has to be perfect!’

Adrien climbed to stairs and found his father crawling around the floor. Fabric scraps covered the floor. ‘Père?’

Gabriel looked up and blinked owlishly behind his glasses. His hair stuck up all over the place. ‘Good, you’re home. I lost my last thimble and—’

Something crunched beneath Adrien’s foot. He felt his heart stop.

His father waited a moment before saying, ‘It’s a leather thimble.’

‘Oh, thank God!’ Adrien got on his hands and knees and joined the hunt.

In the end, they found four leather thimbles scattered around the room.

Gabriel stuffed the thimbles into one of the many pockets scattered across his canvas apron and picked up a period appropriate coat. ‘That’s the last one. The show in Paris is tomorrow. I must leave today.’ His shoulders slumped. ‘Will you be all right here alone?’

A breeze floated through the window.

Adrien shivered. ‘Sure, I can’t imagine why not. Are you all right?’

The designer scowled and studied his work. ‘You know how I am before a show.’

‘I’ll—I’ll leave you to it, then.’

‘Adrien? Help me prepare everything for transportation.’

A grin split Adrien’s face. ‘Gladly!’

They wrapped the garments and loaded them into saddlebags.

A melancholy horse with a light purple coat waited patiently to in the yard.

‘Are you sure you’re going to be all right?’ said Adrien. ‘I overheard our neighbours—’

Gabriel ran his hands through his hair, making it stand up even more on end. ‘What have I told you about gossiping?’

‘You mean what has Nathalie told me about gossiping?’

‘Hm.’ Gabriel mounted his horse. ‘I’ll be back in a week.’

‘Father, are you sure you don’t want me to come with you? The discussion was about a wolf pack in the area.’

The horse’s ears twitched backwards.

‘I’m sure we’ll be fine.’

A squirrel scolded a dog from its tree.

‘Is—ahem—is there anything I can get you? A present to make up for being gone.’

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck. ‘A rose? Like—’ He took a deep breath. ‘A rose like Mother used to grow.’

He braced for his father’s anger.

‘I’ll see what I can do. Until next week.’ Gabriel clicked his tongue and trotted away.

Adrien sighed and watched his father leave. Again. But the lack of anger at mentioning Emilie—that was promising.

‘Adrien may be stuck here,’ said Plagg teasingly.

He looked at the kwami. ‘Are you saying I should sneak along?’

‘Whatever is happening, it’s bound to be more interesting than this little old village.’

Adrien thought for a moment. Transform and sneak along? Or remain in the village which allowed significantly more freedom than Rapunzel’s tower and even the mansion in Paris?

‘I’ll stay here.’

‘Bor-ring!’ Plagg floated alongside his chosen as they returned to the house.

‘Maybe. But I’d rather wait for Ladybug or Marinette. They’ve always found us before. Whatever Father’s up to has to be related to the story.’

It was late afternoon when Adrien jumped at a knock on the door.

Plagg dove for cover behind a loaf of bread.

‘Adrien!’

Adrien turned around. ‘Lila? What a surprise.’

‘I’m just full of surprises.’

‘What are you—how did you get here?’

She played with the necklace around her neck. ‘Does it matter?’ She leaned against the bottom-half of the Dutch door. ‘Did I just see your dad leave?’

‘Yeah, he’s going to a fashion show.’

Her hands stilled. ‘And he didn’t take you with him? That’s disappointing.’

Adrien shrugged and wondered how to politely slam the door in her face.

She reached inside and turned the knob, stepping inside. ‘Are your bodyguards here?’

‘Bodyguards? I only have one—oh! No, Nathalie and my bodyguard aren’t here.’ He rubbed one of his arms. ‘Wish they were, though. It’s really quiet here all by myself.’

‘I can help with that!’

‘Thanks, Lila, but I’d rather not. I don’t think my father—’

She curled up in one of the kitchen chairs and smiled sweetly. ‘I heard there’s a band of travelling musicians performing in the town square today. Would you like to see it?’

‘Thanks, but I have some things to take care of.’

‘Oh, Adrien—’

‘Lila, I really have work to do.’

She put her feet on the table.

Adrien tried not to gag at the extremely gauche behaviour.

‘Come on. I know you dream of escaping your father’s control.’

‘Lila—’

She perched on the table and caught the front of his shirt. ‘Adrien, I’m inviting you to the event of a lifetime.’

As he backed up, she followed him.

His back ran into the wall.

She slithered closer. ‘So it is going to be “yes” or “oh, yes”?’

Back pressed against the wall, Adrien said, ‘I just-I just don’t deserve you.’

A sack of flour turned over, spilling all over Lila.

She jumped back. ‘Ugh! There’s no way this will come out!’

‘So sorry. I think we have a stray cat that gets in here sometimes.’

‘This is a new dress, too!’ Lila ran out of the house.

Adrien sighed with relief. ‘Thanks, Plagg.’

‘Six wheels of Camembert,’ said the kwami.

‘She’s getting more and more aggressive. I wonder—’

A horse’s screams shattered the quiet of the afternoon.

The pale purple horse stopped in front of the house and kicked at the door.

Adrien ran out, nearly tripping over his long white apron. ‘Father’s horse!’ He caught the bridle and held it. ‘What happened? Where’s Father?’

Plagg floated by the horse’s wild eyes and did a double-take. He blinked back tears as rage gathered inside him. Nooroo didn’t deserve this. ‘Kid, look at the saddle.’

Long marks covered the saddle. Clumps of hair were missing from Nooroo’s—for Nooroo it was and he deserves to be called by his proper name, no matter how oblivious our protagonists may be—from Nooroo’s mane.

‘Saddle up; it’s gonna long ride.’

Adrien climbed into the saddle and rode into the darkening east.

They went past fields and into the woods. The road wandered hither and thither.

At first Adrien and Plagg exchanged jokes and quips. As the darkness grew, silence fell. Three sets of ears twitched and listened for the wolves or even a sign of Gabriel Agreste.

A wolf howled.

Nooroo whinnied but continued further.

‘Plagg, claws out.’

The woods lit up with green light before settling back into their usual darkness.

Five minutes later, Nooroo stopped in front of the walls of a castle.

‘What is this place?’

The gates opened.

A shiver ran down Chat Noir’s back as they entered into the courtyard.

The gates swung shut the moments Nooroo’s tale was across the boundary line.

Chat Noir slid from his mount and entered the castle. ‘He—hello? Is anyone here?’

The door banged shut behind him.

‘I’m looking for my—for Monsieur Agreste!’ 

A whisper said, ‘Is it he?’

‘Can it be?’ said another whisper.’

‘It’s Chat Noir!’ cried a third voice.

‘He’s the one we’ve been waiting for!’ whispered the first.

‘He’s so dreamy. How could she not recognise him?’

‘Shut. Up!’

Chat Noir pulled out his baton. In the candlelight, he could just make out footprints in the dust. He followed them through the dining room where they were joined by smaller, lighter steps.

A patch of dust was disturbed by the wall, as if someone had lain or rolled there.

He touched the freshly crumbled plaster of the wall. His heightened senses could just make out the smell of his father’s cologne.

Chat Noir followed the smell and the footprints up as series of stairs and into one of the towers. There was less dust on the stone steps, but the smell of cologne grew stronger with each step.

‘Plagg,’ he whispered, ‘claws in.’

Plagg lingered in the shadows.

Adrien stepped onto the top step and looked around the small tower.

A pale shape lay curled against a stone wall.

‘Père!’ Chat Noir ran over. ‘Are you all right? Who did this to you?’

The designer looked up. He coughed until his whole body shook. ‘A-Adrien? You shouldn’t have come.’ He gripped the iron bars. ‘You have to get out of here. Now!’

‘What are you doing here?’ said a woman’s voice.

Adrien turned around. He could just make out a cloaked form in the shadows. ‘I came to rescue my father! You have to let him go! He’s not doing anyone any harm.’

The woman snorted. ‘I’ve seen what he’s done. I’ve seen what he’s gotten away with. Gabriel Agreste will pay.’

Adrien tilted his head in question. ‘Come into the light.’

The cloaked figure stepped into the narrow moonbeam in the middle of the room. She removed her hood and let her cloak fall.

‘Ladybug?’

‘Hello, Adrien.’ Her smile was grim.

Adrien struggled to breathe. He shouldn’t have released his transformation. ‘He’s not a good man, but he’s not a bad man. Please. Let him go.’ Adrien took a deep breath. ‘I’ll stay here in his stead.’

Ladybug’s eyes flicked from son to father and back again. ‘My grievances are with how he treats you.’

Adrien tensed, prepared to call for Plagg. ‘But I’ll be here and he’ll be elsewhere.’

‘Very well, _chaton_. I will release him.’

She threw open the cell door and dragged the designer to the courtyard where Nooroo waited. ‘Take him to the village. Make sure he doesn’t return.’

Chat Noir dropped into the courtyard. ‘Good to run into you, My Lady, but should we be allowing a civilian into the dark woods by himself without protection?’

‘You know what he’s done.’

‘You don’t know his reasons!’

‘Why are you defending him? The man isolates and neglects his son! Have you stopped to think why he has a purple horse?’

‘What does that have to do with anything?’

Ladybug hesitated before saying, ‘My kwami has taken different forms in different stories. And one of them was a horse. A _talking_ horse.’

They looked at Nooroo.

Nooroo looked at Gabriel.

Gabriel huddled more deeply into his period-appropriate jacket and dug his heels into Nooroo’s flanks.

The gates opened and shut for him.

Chat Noir grabbed his baton. ‘I can’t let you do this, My Lady.’ He sprinted after his father.

‘Adrien, wait!’

He stopped and stared at her. ‘What? How?’

Ladybug picked up her cloak and wrapped it over Chat Noir’s shoulders. ‘You lost a shoe in _Cinderella_ , remember? A boot with a green paw print on the sole.’

Chat Noir squeaked, ‘I didn’t—’

He stopped and cleared his throat. ‘I didn’t lose a shoe.’

‘But Adrien did.’ She took a step closer. ‘Adrien who kept calling me “princess”. Only Chat Noir calls me that.’

‘I never call you—oh!’ He smacked himself in the face. ‘I am such a _bête_.’

Her cheeks turned pink. ‘You’re also a bit of a _beau._ ’

Chat Noir blushed. ‘So, um,’ he scraped his boot on the ground.

‘Adrien?’

‘Hi.’

Her smile held but tears glistened in her eyes.

Snow gathered in her hair.

‘Marinette?’

‘Tikki, spots off.’

The pink light flashed.

‘Plagg, claws in.’

They stood and stared at each other as the snow fell and gathered in the gloom.

Marinette giggled first before outright laughing.

Adrien’s cheeks were on fire. ‘I can’t believe it.’

‘What, that Clumsynette is secretly Ladybug?’

‘No, not that! That I’ve been in the same class as Ladybug all this time and I was too fixated on the costume to realise who you were!’ He ran his hands through his hair. ‘You literally had Tikki with you in _Rapunzel_ and in _Little Mermaid_! I can’t believe—how blind was I?’

‘It’s called looooooooooove,’ said Tikki.

‘You mean hormoooooooooooones,’ trilled Plagg. 

Marinette laughed harder. ‘Sorry, but you look really cute when you pout.’

‘I deserve it!’ Adrien crossed his arms.

Marinette shivered.

‘Ahem,’ said Tikki. ‘Maybe we can continue this conversation inside?’

Adrien wrapped the cloak around Marinette, pulling her close. He really was an idiot.

Gabriel stumbled into the tavern. ‘Help! Someone help!’

Everyone turned and stared at him.

‘Calm down, old man,’ said Lila.

‘She has him! She’s got him locked up!’

‘Who has whom?’

Gabriel took a deep breath and tried to calm his thoughts. ‘Ladybug has Adrien. She has him imprisoned. Please, help me.’

Lila’s eyes narrowed as she smiled.

He shuddered, remembering the sea witch’s smile. ‘Akuma Matata?’

‘Clever, aren’t you?’

Lila transformed into Akuma Matata. She lounged in her chair, legs swinging over the chair’s arm. She studied the head of cane, smiling fondly at the frozen butterfly. ‘We’ll help you, old man.’

‘You will?’

She jerked her chin. ‘Let’s help him on his way.’

Several people grabbed the designer and threw him outside and into the snow.

They laughed as he picked himself up.

‘Crazy old Agreste,’ said one.

‘He’s always good for a laugh.’

‘Crazy old Agreste.’ Akuma Matata sat back and smirked. To the butterfly, she said, ‘What better way to destroy your master than to allow him the success of destroying the Heroes of Paris—and his son.’

Her cackle filled the room. 

Everyone stopped and stared.

‘He’s right.’ She stood up and planted her cane on the ground. A little theatre would work wonders on the boozed crowd. ‘Ladybug will make off with your children in the night.’

‘No!’

‘Once they’re Akumatized, she’ll come after them in the night! We’re not safe until her Miraculous are on Hawkmoth’s wall.’

Through the mist and the darkness and the shadow came a mob, furious, ready to end the madness of Ladybug.

The teapot known as Hoborg sighed with contentment. ‘They’re so happy together.’

‘It’s about time,’ said TheMiraculousAdmiral, studying the wax melting down their metal arms. ‘They’re as observant as a box of rocks concerning each other’s identities.’

Mermain123 sneezed, sending cogs and gears everywhere. ‘Why did I get stuck as Cogsworth?’

‘Are you complaining?’ said Hoborg. ‘You get to hit all the killer notes.’

‘It’d still be nice to human again,’ said TheMiraculousAdmiral.

‘No,’ said Mermain123. ‘We are not singing. They’re practically asleep at this point!’

‘But have they kissed yet?’

‘What kind of a question is that?’

‘True love’s kiss to break the spell, y’know?’

‘You really think it’s that easy?’

‘I hope so.’

Hoborg groaned. ‘You could say it’s a _tale as old as time_.’

‘Nope! Not going there! I overheard the kwamis complaining about _Little Mermaid_.’

‘I love _Little Mermaid!_ ’

Tikki and Plagg settled on the table by the speaking teapot, candelabra, and clock.

‘Singing against your will is never fun,’ said Tikki.

‘Aw, I think we had fun, Sugar Cube,’ said Plagg with a wink.

Tikki groaned. ‘I’m going to say something very unkind: These are the two most obtuse Chosens we’ve ever had.’

‘There’s a bold statement. Care to back it up?’

‘Yeah.’ Tikki turned to her brother. ‘I’d stake a month’s worth of Camembert _and_ a month’s worth of cookies.’

Plagg nodded. ‘Fair.’ He turned to Hoborg. ‘Do you know if there’s any Camembert in the fridge?’

The teapot shrugged. 

Mermain123 tapped where their chin should be. Their eyes went big. ‘Oh!’

‘Oh what?’ said TheMiraculousAdmiral.

‘Incoming mob.’

The five sprinted over to the window.

‘Hm, interesting,’ said TheMiraculousAdmiral. ‘There are significantly fewer than I expected.’

‘Well, excuse me,’ said Mermain123, ‘but according to the runtime, there should be a big ass mob out there chanting “kill the beast”.’

‘Mistranslation,’ grunted Plagg. ‘Gets you every time.’

‘Maybe _you_ ,’ said Tikki.

The Romantic Duo woke up at the first blow to the castle doors. They immediately transformed and went to face the interlopers.

The doors burst open.

A bedraggled Gabriel rolled across the floor and to a stop.

The heroes stopped and stared.

Chat Noir’s ears flattened. ‘He’s not supposed to be here.’

Akuma Matata walked in, a black cane with a butterfly head in hand. ‘It seems like several liberties are being taken with this narrative.’

‘I hate a good fight,’ said Hoborg.

‘What do we do?’ said Mermain123.

The three looked at each other. Instantly, they started chanting, ‘Kiss the girl! Kiss the girl!’

Akuma Matata sneered at the three. ‘None of that, now.’

‘Kiss the girl?’ said Chat Noir.

‘Of course!’ Ladybug turned to her partner. ‘True love’s kiss!’

He grinned. ‘May I kiss you?’

‘Please do.’

Chat Noir leaned in for a kiss, the first of many, he was sure.

His lips touched cold metal.

‘I don’t think so,’ said Akuma Matata, holding her cane between them. ‘You see, I’ve a few plans left for Dear Old Dad. I’d hate for you to get in my way.’

Chat Noir grabbed the cane and held it tightly. ‘You’re ruining my happy ending!’

The Akuma’s eyebrows rose. ‘Oh, this has potential. If you’re afraid of losing your happy ending, that means you found it.’

Ladybug looked from Akuma Matata to Chat Noir. ‘Chat? What is it?’

He looked at her. ‘Don’t you know, Princess? It’s you.’

The castle groaned.

Akuma Matata looked at Gabriel. ‘What would Hawkmoth have me do?’

Gabriel looked from the heroes—his son and a perfectly tolerable young woman—and back to the Akuma. ‘Hawkmoth would…he would have you finish it.’

‘Why?’

He gulped. ‘Because he must undo the mistakes of the past.’

Akuma Matata rested the cane on her shoulder. ‘So long as you live in the past you’ll never find your future.’

Gabriel laughed. ‘Careful there, Akuma Matata.’

‘Why?’

He limped forward and faced her. ‘You’re forgetting: Wicked may be coming but Evil lives here.’

A cold blue light gathered behind the trees.

Ladybug and Chat Noir clung to each other as a fresh wind poured over them.

Their fingers slipped apart.

Chat Noir flew away. ‘Marinette!’

‘I’ll find you!’ She pressed her arms to her sides and torpedoed into the light. ‘I will always find you!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all know the drill. Guess the next chapter, be featured, beware of canes and Akumas with a vendetta.


	8. Once Upon a Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a Disney movie, and I don't care. One person guessed correctly, but I couldn't find an account name (sorry!). 
> 
> For anyone who read "Old Sins", this chapter came first! ;)

Nathalie took a deep breath and looked around. Trees, unfamiliar birdsong, and—she breathed deeply—extremely fresh air.

She took a step forward and fell face first into a clump of ferns. She looked at her outfit. ‘What am I wearing?’

A black velvet coat with crimson trim hugged her body and fell to her ankles. The front cut-away exposed black leather trousers and a corset-style top cinched in at the waist. Diamonds dripped from her neck and ears.

Nathalie reached for her hair and felt a hat perched at a saucy angle. Her hair fell down her back and swished with each motion.

No glasses.

She shrugged. No matter. Whatever was happening, she could see perfectly fine without them.

Nathalie took one more look around her before spotting a path. She marched over the uneven ground. Five minutes of walking brought her into a clearing with familiar mountains in the background. Where was this?

A shuffling step caught her attention.

Gabriel appeared from behind a clump of trees. He wore a tasteful dark suit, had chin-length hair, and leaned heavily on a cane.

‘Sir?’

He stopped and stared at her. ‘What are you wearing?’

Something clicked. Could it be? ‘Something far better than you could ever design.’

He continued to stare.

Nathalie grabbed the bodice and tried to adjust it upwards.

‘No, leave it. It suits you perfectly.’ Gabriel’s hand tightened on his cane as he walked around her. ‘You should wear your hair like that more often.’

‘Really, sir. What exactly is happening?’

‘Adrien and I have been travelling through different Disney movies.’ He glanced up as one of the trees rustled. ‘I can’t imagine what this one is. _Enchanted_ is the only live action princess themed film that I can recall, and we’ve already been there.’

Nathalie rested her gloved hands on her hips. ‘This wouldn’t happen to be because of an Akuma, would it?’

Gabriel’s hand twitched on his cane. ‘Why would you say that, dearie?’

‘Oh, I don’t know. I’m dressed like the proverbial Evil Queen, you’re suddenly in need of a cane, and we are nowhere near Paris if the air quality is any indicator.’

‘A woman was upset after being denied her happily ever after when an Akuma interrupted her wedding ceremony.’

‘And?’

He winced. ‘Her fiancé is one our employees. We called him back from their honeymoon to manage negotiations for the merger.’

‘Happily ever after _and_ Disney themes?’ Nathalie wondered if there was a way to sneak in a request for a raise with the next question. ‘You didn’t call it Akuma Matata by any chance?’

‘Really, Nathalie!’

She raised an eyebrow.

He adjusted his posture, attempting to rescue the remnants of his dignity. ‘How did you know?’

‘It’s an ancient meme.’

‘Hm.’ Gabriel limped forward and walked around Nathalie, studying her dress.

‘Do you really need the cane?’

Speaking through his teeth, he said, ‘Unfortunately it’s not just for show.’ He gave an uncharacteristic tilt of the head.

‘What’s the name of your true love?’

Gabriel stopped and thought. ‘Belle? No, Milah?’ He snapped his gloved fingers. ‘Emilie.’

Nathalie narrowed her eyes. ‘You wouldn’t happen to have a dagger on you, would you?’

‘Not today, not ever, dearie.’

‘Excellent.’

She crossed her arms and vanished in a cloud of purple smoke.

Adrien woke up and looked at his legs. ‘Oh, thank goodness! Trousers!’

He climbed to his feet and looked around. The skirt of a heavy leather coat swished about his legs. ‘Okay, everything is in English. Cars are parked on the right side of the street. Cool temperatures. Must be America?’

He turned and looked at his reflection in a convenient window. Granny’s Diner was printed across the glass. He ruffled his hair and gave a roguish smirk before posing. ‘Whoever this character is, he’s got great guy-liner.’ He lifted his other hand and yelped.

A shiny hook was attached to his left wrist. ‘What happened?

Marinette appeared from an alley. She wore a short red leather jacket and knee-high boots. A sword was strapped to her hip, and her hair was gathered in a ponytail.

‘Marinette!’ Adrien ran for his princess, his _LADY_ , and hugged her.

She jumped into his arms. ‘You’re safe! Love the eyeliner.’

Adrien winked. ‘I can do the bad boy look, too.’

Marinette rolled her eyes and pushed him away with her index finger. ‘Personal space, kitty.’

He bowed and kissed the back of her hand.

‘Oh, my God!’

They looked and saw Chloe sitting on a bench. A red cloak flowed over her shoulders.

‘Seriously,’ she said, ‘I end up in OUaT and the first thing I see is Captain Guy-liner and you making eyes at each other.'

‘Hey!’ Adrien struck a pose. ‘I happen to look great in eye liner.’

‘It’s a bit outdated.’

‘Jagged Stone wears it!’

‘He’s a relic of the 80s!’

‘Kids!’ said Marinette. ‘Calm down.’ She studied Chloe. ‘Let me guess, _Red_ , watching out for wolves?’

‘Sure, Swan.’ Chloe stood up.

Marinette looked down at her clothes and drew her sword. ‘Okay, this is cool. Wait, you’re a Oncer?’

‘Duh! Hot men and hotter women walking around in leather and beating the shit out of each other? And good plotlines for the first three seasons.’ She studied the embroidery on her gloves. ‘They should have had Zelena kill Rumple in the third season. He was useless except for propagating an abusive relationship after that.’

Marinette slid the sword back into its sheath. ‘I can’t believe we agree on something.’

‘How did you get here?’ said Adrien.

‘Pollen was dropped off at my penthouse. I put on the Miraculous and was immediately transported here.’

‘If you came once you had your Miraculous,’ said Marinette, ‘then—’

‘My dudes!’

They turned and saw Alya and Nino emerge from an adjacent alley. Alya wore a furred waistcoat with a heavy belt. A quiver of arrows was slung over one shoulder and she carried a bow in one hand.

Nino wore a heavy cloak with a furred collar and carried a sword. ‘That was a wild ride.’ His voice sounded deeper, more authoritative.

Alya whistled. ‘Adrien, rockin’ the guy-liner. But what happened to your hand?’

Nino groaned. ‘Are we in _Once Upon a Time_?’

‘Let me guess,’ said Chloe, ‘Trixx and Wayzz appeared suddenly and now you’re here?’

‘Bingo.’ Nino studied everyone’s costumes. ‘Taking a guess: We’ve got the entire Charming softball team and their pirate mascot and a rogue wolf.’

‘Wait,’ Alya held up her hands, ‘if Chloe’s Red, then who’s the Evil Queen?’

A cloud of purple smoke gathered by the five. Nathalie stepped out.

‘Seriously?’ said Marinette. ‘She’s here, too?’

‘Says the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming,’ said Chloe.

‘Damn straight, she’s our child,’ said Alya.

‘Couldn’t be prouder,’ said Nino, accepting a fist-bump from his girlfriend. 

‘Nathalie?’ said Adrien.

‘I thought I caught a whiff of desperation and coffee,’ said Nino.

‘It’s anxiety,’ said Nathalie dryly as she walked over to the group. 

‘Anxiety by any other name.’

‘I really don’t have time to deal with your taunts.’

Nino whistled. ‘Okay, maybe you do make a better Evil Queen than Chloe.’

‘I don’t know whether to be flattered or insulted,’ said Nathalie.

‘Same,’ said Chloe. ‘But damn, Nathalie! Has Gabriel seen you dressed that way?’

‘It took him about thirty seconds to remember to look at the costume and not me.’

‘He’s here?’ said Adrien, playing with his hook. ‘Is he okay?’

‘He’s Rumpelstiltskin but seems otherwise unharmed.’

Marinette, Nino, and Chloe all inhaled sharply.

‘What’s the significance of that?’ said Alya.

‘He’s the main antagonist,’ said Marinette, ‘and the reason every bit of drama happens.’

‘The show literally happens because he’s trying to find his lost—’ Nino gulped and stared at Adrien. ‘His lost son.’

‘This is getting serious.’

Adrien chewed on his lip. ‘You’re saying my father is the villain?’

‘Could’ve spotted that one a mile away,’ said Nino.

Adrien frowned. ‘I’m having trouble imagining my father as an old wrinkly man.’

‘He doesn’t look like that in the show,’ said Marinette. ‘Most of the time.’

‘He doesn’t look like that now,’ said Nathalie.

Chloe raised an eyebrow. ‘Really?’ she drawled. ‘What exactly does he look like? Does he smell like forest by any chance?’ 

Nathalie gave her a withering look.

‘I-I don’t understand,’ said Adrien.

‘I do,’ said Alya. ‘I understood _that_ reference.’

‘And I got that one,’ said Marinette.

‘I got all of those references,’ said Nino.

‘Yay, we’re all major nerds!’ said Chloe sarcastically. ‘Should we up the ante and point out that the original of the original of the reference involved flying monkeys as well?’

‘Let’s not and say we did,’ said Alya. ‘But in the meantime, Mar, what’s the sitch?’

Marinette said, ‘An Akuma sucked us in when battling Ladybug and Chat Noir.’

‘We keep going through different Disney stories,’ said Adrien.

‘Adrien or Chat Noir have been the princess figure in each one.’

Everyone studied Adrien.

‘How does Hook qualify as a princess?’ said Alya.

‘He gets rescued a lot?’ said Nino.

‘Hook does regularly fall victim to someone’s control or curse,’ said Chloe.

‘It’s a thin excuse, but it checks out,’ said Nino. ‘I mean, _OUaT_ is Disney property and has all of the Disney princesses at least once.’

‘As long as I don’t have to be Snow White again, I don’t care,’ said Adrien.

Nathalie winced.

‘Even if _Frozen_ was the worst one.’

‘Oh, please!’ said Marinette. ‘ _Snow White_ was the worst! Hawkmoth tried to have Ladybug kill you!’

‘He did?’

‘He what?’ Nathalie’s voice cracked.

‘Well,’ Marinette tapped her index fingers together, ‘except that Akuma Matata appeared later and looked just like Hawkmoth, so maybe it was her instead.’

‘Wait, wait, wait,’ said Alya. ‘Akuma Matata? Doesn’t he know that meme is deader than Sarcastic Wonka?’

‘Apparently not.’

Nathalie fiddled with her gloves. ‘There is an important piece of information that you should all know: Mr Agreste does not have the Dark One’s dagger.’

‘Shit,’ whispered Nino.

‘Check your pockets,’ said Marinette. ‘Maybe one of us has it.’

‘You really think we’d be that lucky?’ said Nino.

‘What does it look like?’ said Alya.

Nathalie held up her hands. ‘About so long, wavy edges, and it will have a name on it.’

‘None of us have it.’

‘We have to find it! If the Akuma has it, we’re all good as dead.’

Alya rolled her eyes. ‘You’re bossy when you’re scared.’

‘I’m not bossy,’ snapped Nathalie.

Marinette said, ‘She is the Queen—’

‘Evil Queen.’

‘She’s the Queen,’ said Chloe. ‘Pretty sure her job is to boss people around.’

‘Says the daughter of Style Queen,’ muttered Marinette.

‘Hey!’

‘Looking for something, my sweets?’ said a woman’s cool voice.

Everyone turned and saw a tall woman in a tight black dress. Her lips were as pink as her skin was green. A pointy black hat perched on her head.

She clenched the dagger in one hand.

‘Zelena?’ said Nino.

Marinette drew her sword. ‘Akuma Matata.’

Adrien snorted. ‘Sorry, I can’t keep a straight face.’

Akuma Matata smiled condescendingly. ‘No, you’re not used to operating without a mask.’ Cool eyes swept over the assembled faces. ‘My, my, this is a party.’

‘Why did you bring us here?’ said Chloe. ‘I have much better things to do than hang around in some backwoods town that doesn’t even have good Wi-Fi. And red is _totally_ not my colour!’

‘I happen to be in the market for revenge.’ The Akuma stroked the smooth side of the dagger. ‘A pity I won’t remember it once my object is broken and the Akuma cleansed.’

‘We will,’ said Marinette.

‘I’m counting on it.’ Akuma held the dagger up. ‘Rumpelstiltskin, I summon thee.’

Nothing happened.

Marinette whispered instructions to her fellow heroes.

‘Gabriel Agreste, I summon thee.’

The heroes slowly made a circle around the Akuma.

Marinette looked at Nathalie. ‘Can I trust you?’

The diamonds winked as Nathalie nodded.

‘Fascinating.’ Akuma Matata chuckled. ‘Hawkmoth, I summon thee.’

A puff of purple smoke appeared beside her.

Gabriel leaned on his cane. ‘Damn you.’

‘No,’ whispered Adrien.

‘Your mistake. You supported the invocation of this chapter.’ The Akuma eyed the heroes surrounding her. She tapped her shoulder with the dagger. ‘I’m flattered that the Guardian thinks so many are needed to take me down.’ She looked at the dagger. ‘But then, a Hawkmoth stripped of his inhibitions and granted the power of The Dark One may be worthy of all five of the Heroes of Paris.’

‘Father?’ said Adrien.

A grey-faced Gabriel turned to face his son. ‘It was never supposed to go this far.’

Eye-liner blackened tears trickled down Adrien’s face. ‘Why did you do this?’

Gabriel limped to his son.

Adrien backed away.

Alya notched an arrow and drew her bow. ‘Stay away from him.’

Gabriel stopped. ‘I’m trying to keep you safe, to give you a better life.’

‘How does you becoming Hawkmoth do that?’

‘I—I—’

‘He’s trying to bring Emilie back,’ said Nathalie.

‘Quiet!’ Gabriel turned and pushed his hand through the air.

Nathalie deflected the spell with one of her own.

‘Mother wouldn’t have wanted this!’ shouted Adrien. ‘ _I_ don’t want this!’

‘She’s the one who gave me the Miraculouses in the first place.’

Adrien gave Nathalie a pleading look. ‘It’s not true! Please.’

She pursed her lips before nodding. ‘You feed the madness, the madness feeds you.’

Chloe hissed. ‘You’re Mayura! You’re the only one with an unaccounted Miraculous.’ Chloe shed her cloak and transformed into a wolf.

Akuma Matata grinned at the chaos. ‘My, this _is_ fun! All the Miraculouses in one spot and the destruction of the Agreste family? I love when Christmas comes early. Hawkmoth?’

Gabriel glared at her. ‘I can still remove the Akuma from you.’

‘No, you can’t. You invoked something which you did not understand.’

‘I know the laws of the Dark One!’

‘You forgot about the dagger! You really think I wouldn’t have found it as soon as we ended up here?’ Akuma Matata spun around, looking at the gathered heroes. ‘There’s a reason it took all four of us to create this reality.’ She held up the dagger. ‘Hawkmoth, rid me of these pests.’

Gabriel turned to Alya and Nino. ‘Get the dagger and the Dark One will be on your side.’ He made a shoving motion with his hand.

Alya and Nino went flying through the window of Granny’s Diner.

He turned to Marinette. ‘You have to get the dagger or I will destroy you all.’

Alya and Nino jumped out of the broken window.

Marinette drew her own sword and eyed the Akuma. ‘You don’t have to do this, Akuma Matata. If you release your anger—’

‘I will have my revenge on Agreste and Hawkmoth,’ snarled the Akuma. 

She waved her hand, throwing Marinette against a car.

Marinette groaned as she climbed to her feet.

Akuma Matata strolled over. ‘Lucky for me, they’re one and the same.’

On the other side of the street, wolf-Chloe stalked Nathalie.

Nathalie held a fireball in one hand and circled away from her. Closer to the Akuma.

‘It’s fascinating how careless people can be of their secret identities. Like all of you gathered here.’ Akuma Matata flicked the dagger, forcing Hawkmoth to continue his attacks. ‘I’m surprised that neither of the Agrestes figured out each other’s identities.’

An arrow grazed the Akuma’s cheek.

She spun and snarled.

Alya notched another arrow. ‘Glad to know Adrien comes by his obliviousness honestly.’

‘Alya!’ said Marinette. She stopped and stared at the dagger.

The cane.

The mirror.

All made of metal.

The Akumatized object?

She spun her sword into the air. ‘Lucky Charm!’

The sword fell back into her hand, changed to match the dagger. Curling script read _Chat Noir._

Marinette looked up and found Adrien.

He sat on the steps the library, his good hand covering his mouth. Tears streamed down his cheeks.

Akuma Matata flicked her finger. The motion tugged on Nathalie’s skirt, tripping her.

Nathalie landed hard on her back.

Wolf-Chloe pounced on the fallen witch and growled.

Nathalie teleported away.

Alya fired an arrow at Hawkmoth.

He spun it around and sent it back in her direction.

A purple cloud appeared between the two.

‘No!’ cried Gabriel.

Nathalie looked at the arrow buried in her chest. She looked back up at her employer, her face riddled with confusion. 

Hawkmoth ran and caught her as she crumpled. ‘No, no, no! Nathalie!’

‘She was dying anyways,’ said the Akuma. ‘You’re rather careless with those you claim to love.’

‘I don’t—I don’t—’

‘Don’t insult me. I know love, twisted as it is, when I see it.’

When Gabriel attempted a healing spell, Akuma Matata said, ‘I still have use for you. Up, up, up!’ 

He lay Nathalie down and turned to Alya and Nino.

Marinette skirted the drama and sat beside Adrien. ‘I need your help.’

‘My father is Hawkmoth,’ mumbled Adrien. ‘He’s Hawkmoth.’

‘Adrien, please.’ She lay her head on his shoulder. ‘We can do this together.’

Nino dodged a spell and struck at the Akuma.

Adrien saw the sword with Chat Noir’s name on the blade. ‘Will that control me?’

She nodded. ‘I can give it to you.’

‘No.’ He twined his fingers with hers. ‘I trust you, My Lady. I trust you completely.’

He pressed his lips to her forehead. ‘Plagg, claws out.’

When nothing happened, Marinette said, ‘I think we’re already transformed. Sort of.’

‘Stuck in between ourselves and our superselves? That would be why I haven’t seen Plagg at all.’ Adrien managed a weak smile. ‘He’d be laughing his ass off at my makeup.’

Marinette held up the wavy-edged sword. In a clear voice, she said, ‘Chat Noir, get the dagger from Akuma Matata.’

Adrien swaggered over to the Akuma. ‘Akuma Matata! The dagger, if you please.’

She grinned at him. ‘I don’t think so. You’re trying to kidnap what I’ve rightfully stolen. Bad luck about Hawkmoth being your father. I mean,’ she lay a hand against her chest, ‘I had no idea, but imagine my pleasure at realising everyone’s identities!’

‘Why did you chose Zelena’s form?’ said Marinette. ‘Were you jealous of the Agrestes?’

‘Not at all. But she was the only one with a deep, burning hatred that can match what I bear for Gabriel Agreste and all who belong to him.’

‘We’re the heroes,’ said Marinette. ‘Why are you punishing us?’

‘Do you ever think that perhaps heroes cause just as much damage as the villain?’

Wolf-Chloe pounced on the Akuma.

She spun and threw the wolf back, leaving the dagger exposed.

Nino raised his sword and brought it down on the dagger.

It shattered into several pieces.

Green light flashed over the square.

Akuma Matata caught Nino by the neck and raised him into the air. ‘You’ll pay for that.’

Prince Charming winked at her.

The wolf pounced on the witch and tore at her throat. She caught the necklace in her teeth and threw it aside.

‘Cataclysm!’

Adrien caught necklace with his hook.

The necklace dissolved into dust.

Akuma Matata screamed as the black butterfly flew into the air.

Marinette realised her sword had turned back to her usual yoyo. She caught and purified the butterfly.

Black bubbles fell from the Akuma victim.

She immediately vanished.

Nino grabbed the crimson cloak and threw it over the wolf.

A minute later, Chloe sat up.

Alya motioned to the corner of her mouth. ‘Uh, Chloe? You got something on your chin.’

‘Oops.’ Chloe wiped at the blood.

Marinette tensed, ready to throw the Lucky Charm in the air.

‘Wait.’ Nino grabbed her arm. ‘Can you specify what you want to restore?’

‘What do you mean?’

He looked at Adrien laying in the dust, distraught kitten eyes turned on his father cradling Nathalie’s body. ‘Wipe our memories. They do it all the time in the show.’

‘That would mean—’

‘Mar, it’s worth it.’

She turned the sword over in her hand. ‘All magic comes at a price. We’ll forget everything from here.’

‘It’ll be worth it.’ He looked at Adrien. ‘I can’t handle him being broken like this.’

‘If not today, then sometime in the future.’

‘We’ll deal with it then.’ Nino gave her a grim smile. ‘But not here, not now. Not stuck in Storybrooke.’

Marinette nodded before hugging her friend tightly. She stepped back. ‘Miraculous Ladybug!’

She threw the sword bearing Chat Noir's name into the air.

It exploded into pink ladybugs and swept over the town.

Everyone relaxed.

Marinette watched as her friends faded into the air, back to Paris.

Nino maintained his encouraging smile as he faded away.

Gabriel whimpered as Nathalie faded from his arms. He staggered to his feet and saw his son beside him. As he reached for Adrien’s shoulder, he faded away as well.

Marinette knelt by Adrien. ‘Kitty? Are you all right?’

He sat up and squinted at her. ‘I know you.’

She smiled at him and smoothed his hair back.

‘I danced with you once upon a dream.’

Blue and purple smoke settled over the town.

Marinette held on as long as she could before fading away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: An even darker version of this chapter existed once upon a time. It was also about twice as long which is an absolute no. 
> 
> The next chapter will be happier and fluffier. I promise.


	9. Sleeping Beauty

Marinette struggled to her feet. Once again, a forest. Once again, knee-high boots over leggings. The grey tunic and red cape pronounced themselves to be from the fourteenth century.

She reached up and felt a jaunty hat perched on her braided hair. Not the worst costume yet. Actually, all of her costumes had been comfortable so far. Perks of being the prince in just about all of them.

A horse whickered nearby.

‘Tikki?’ She pushed through the heavy undergrowth and found a stream.

‘I’m a horse again,’ said the red with black dots animal.

‘Maybe that means we’re reaching the end of the story. Symmetry and balance, right?’

Tikki looked sceptical. ‘I’m not sure.’

She stroked Tikki’s neck. ‘We’re in another forest—’

‘Which means it’s another Grimm tale, as likely as not.’ Tikki huffed.

‘What do you have against the Brothers Grimm?’

‘They were Miraculous wielders and squandered their responsibility in dangerous and embarrassing ways.’ A shiver ran across Tikki’s flank. ‘I hoped to never see any of them again.’

Marinette rubbed Tikki’s nose. ‘I just want to go home.’

‘Don’t worry, Marinette! You defeated the Akuma last time. Now you just have to find out how to get home.’ Tikki nipped Marinette’s cheek. ‘It’s a good thing, too. The Akuma was getting tired.’

‘Oh!’

Tikki’s ears twitched.

‘Tired, sleepy…’ Marinette looked down at her outfit. ‘Sleeping Beauty. I’m Prince Philip! We’re in Sleeping Beauty!’

Tikki’s ears went flat. ‘That’s one of the darkest tales.’

‘Maybe we’ll get lucky and avoid the ogre-in-law who tries to eat Aurora and her children?’

‘Like I said, they squandered their responsibility.’

The sound of a river caught their attention. The followed the river which led them to iron gates set in a stone wall. Rose canes and stems spilled the dingy white walls. 

Marinette lightly touched the rusty iron gates.

They swung open, silent despite the rust.

The remains of a once beautiful stone road disappeared into the tangled brambles.

Marinette took a step towards the tangle.

Roses sprung into bloom before moving aside and clearing the path.

Beyond the thicket, a great white castle stood on a hill, gleaming in the moonlight.

With every confident step, the path cleared just enough for girl and horse to walk through. The vegetation returned to its spot once they had moved forward.

Marinette tangled her fingers in Tikki’s mane. ‘Nowhere to go but up.’

Tikki nuzzled her Chosen.

The air was full of the smell of freshly bloomed roses. By the time the ground sloped upwards, Marinette felt as if she was floating on the smell. It should have been overpowering. But in the cool night air, it felt perfect. It felt Right.

And she had a pretty good idea as to what slept in the castle beyond.

No dragon challenged her, no ghostly remains sang. The peace was welcome after the horror of the previous chapter.

‘We’re here,’ whispered Tikki.

They stood at the great double-doors of the castle.

Tikki tapped her hoof against the door and entered.

A blaze of colour welcomed them. Men and women in various costumes slept in every room: Foxes, Peafowls, Turtles, and Cats.

Ladybugs.

‘What are these?’ whispered Marinette as they passed through the third room.

‘They’re past Miraculous holders,’ said Tikki as they walked past a Sheep.

‘So when a Miraculous holder dies, they come here?’

‘Not exactly.’ Tikki carefully stepped over a cuddling Butterfly and Peafowl. ‘They are our memories of them.’ She eyed Marinette. ‘We remember all of our holders.’ She looked at the pair on the floor. ‘Especially the soulmates.’

They looked through every room on every floor. Her heart leapt every time she saw a scrap of black leather. None were hers.

She noticed that few of the previous Holders rested with another Miraculous Holder. The only ones who seemed to have any regularity were Ladybug and/or Chat Noir, usually with each other.

They were almost to the top of the castle when they found a room empty save for a single glass case.

A white marble fireplace stood against one wall. The clock sitting on the mantle looked like Mermain123 from _Beauty and the Beast_.

But Marinette only had eyes for the glass case.

‘Adrien,’ whispered Marinette. She ran to the case in the centre of the room.

A blonde woman lay with her hands at her side, a soft smile on her face.

‘Adrien’s mother?’ Marinette set her hand on the case, but it slipped through. ‘Tikki?’

Tikki shook her head. ‘She’s in a coma. See how she’s dressed partly as a peafowl, partly in street clothes? She’s not dead but she’s not fully alive.’

‘Can we do anything?’

‘Not from here.’

When Marinette made no sign of moving, Tikki said, ‘Come, Marinette. We have to go.’

Marinette left the room as if in a daze. Once outside, she shook her head and said, ‘Adrien. We’re looking for Adrien.’

‘Exactly.’

They climbed the final staircase.

A few more previous Miraculous holders but no Adrien.

Tears gathered in Marinette’s eyes. ‘Where is he? He should be here!’

She sat down between the sleeping forms of a Dog and a Rooster and cried.

One of her tears landed in a carving in the stone floor.

A wall panel clicked.

As soon as Tikki nudged it, the panel slid aside to reveal a narrow, twisting staircase.

Marinette wiped her tears and climbed up.

Chat Noir lay on his back, arms folded across his stomach. He snored softly.

‘Stupid cat would scare me like that.’ Marinette stood by the large hammock and looked at her sleeping beauty.

True love’s kiss and it would all be over.

She leaned over and touched his face. ‘Chat, I’m going to kiss you.’ She giggled. ‘Once again, I’m going to kiss you to save you and once again you’re not going to remember it.’

Marinette kissed Chat Noir gently.

He blinked his eyes open and stared at her.

Neither said anything for several seconds.

The memory spell! Marinette’s eyes grew large. What if he didn’t remember her?

He stood up slowly and looked around.

‘Do you,’ she licked her lips, ‘do you remember me?’

Chat Noir frowned and looked over the horizon before looking down at her. He winked. ‘How could I ever forget you, Buginette?’

‘You dumb cat!’ She jumped into his arms.

Chat Noir spun her around. ‘Plagg, claws in.’

The green light flashed as they stared at each other.

Plagg, who looked like a tiny fairy, disappeared downstairs in search of Tikki.

‘We did it; we defeated the Akuma.’ Adrien held her until Marinette squeaked. ‘And your kiss saved us from having to go through discovering each other’s identities again.’

He lifted her chin with his index finger. ‘May I have this kiss?’

‘Gladly, _minou_.’

The moment their lips touched, the world exploded with white light.

They looked at the light shining through cracks in the world.

Marinette squeezed Adrien’s hand. ‘I think it’s time to go home. Tikki, spots on!’

‘Plagg! Claws out!’

They stepped through the light and back to the streets of Paris.

Akuma Matata, still dressed as the Wicked Witch, lay on her side. The broken necklace lay beside her.

The butterfly was just crawling from the necklace.

Ladybug flipped open her yoyo. ‘No more evil-doing for you, little Akuma.’

Chat Noir grinned as he watched his Lady—his Marinette!—cleanse the butterfly.

Black bubbles fell away from Akuma Matata, exposing the slim woman beneath.

Ten minutes later, police allowed her new husband through the police barricade.

As they watched the reunited couple, Chat Noir put a hand on Ladybug’s shoulder. ‘Shall we, My Lady?’

‘Race you to the top of the Eiffel Tower!’ She waved to the crowds. ‘Bug out!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thanks to everyone for reading, commenting, and interacting! Just for general discussion, what are some Disney story-lines you'd like to put our lovelies through?


	10. Bonus Chapter: Ever After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CheshireMadd gave me the fabulous idea to tack on a chapter where everyone has an OUaT hangover (since it's the only chapter they don't remember). Et voila!

Adrien hummed as he rubbed his palms together and ran the product through his damp hair. He tossed his head a few times to give it the correct look before parting his bangs to the proper side.

He picked up his phone and took another look in the mirror. He tapped his finger against his chin before digging through a drawer. ‘Ah-ha!’

Plagg zoomed into the room. ‘Adrien! You’re going to be la-ate!’

‘Quiet, Plagg. I need to focus.’

‘What are you—oh, no! Not again! This isn't the 80s, kid!’

Five minutes later, Adrien gave his image a thumbs up. He swapped out his normal white overshirt for a black leather jacket and grabbed his bookbag.

He whistled as he swaggered to the foyer, ready to shock Nathalie.

Instead, he stopped and stared.

‘You’re going to be late if you don’t hurry.’ Nathalie looked up from her tablet. ‘Your driver is waiting—are you wearing eyeliner?’

‘Are you wearing a button-up?’

She looked at her crimson silk button-up. ‘I fancied it. Why are you wearing eyeliner?’

‘I fancied it.’

‘Has Father seen you yet?’ Adrien hurried down the last few steps. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen you show your collarbone.’

Nathalie held her tablet over her chest. ‘Have a good day at school.’

‘Nathalie?’

'Yes?'

‘Has Father seen you yet?’

She pursed her lips and nodded. ‘I’m afraid your reaction was more mature than his was.’

‘Where is he?’

‘In his office. He fell down the stairs this morning and is waiting for the arrival of a cane to help him walk.’ She held up her hand to forestall any questions. ‘He’s fine but in a terrible mood. If you leave without asking anymore questions, I’ll pretend I didn’t see your outfit this morning.’

‘Done!’

Adrien raced out the door and jumped into the waiting car. ‘What did you think of Nathalie’s outfit?’

The driver- _cum_ -bodyguard grunted.

‘Yeah, I can’t believe it either. What’s next? Wearing her hair loose?’ He laughed.

As soon as he stepped into his classroom, Adrien knew something had changed. But what?

Marinette grinned and waved at Adrien, cheeks pink.

He resisted the urge to sweep her off her feet and onto the rooftops of Paris and settled for a modest wave.

It hit him as soon as he sat down. ‘Chloe?’

‘Yeah?’ said the heiress, checking her lipstick in her mirror.

‘Why are you wearing red?’

She snapped the compact shut. ‘I fancied it.’

Adrien studied her red jacket. ‘It looks good on you. I think Ladybug would appreciate it.’

Chloe’s smile turned shy. ‘Thanks.’

Marinette leaned forward. ‘It looks good on you, Chloe.’

Chloe turned her head to hide her smile.

Adrien reached back and played with Marinette’s fingers. ‘And how are you this mor—Your hair’s in a ponytail.’

‘I fancied it.’ She grinned. ‘I wondered how long it would take you to notice.’

‘And your bangs are clipped back.’

‘Do you like it?’

‘It’s absolutely perfect, Princess.’ He kissed her hand.

Marinette booped his nose. 

Everyone in the class (with the exception of Alix) stared.

Alix jumped onto her desk and held out her hands. ‘Pay up, suckers! I called it!’

‘All right,’ said Kim, fishing for his wallet. ‘What exactly happened yesterday?’

Max handed a fifty-euro note to Alix. ‘There was only a twenty-two percent chance you would actually be able to hold a conversation with each other before the end of the school year, never mind engage in any sort of romantic activity.’

‘Well,’ said Marinette, ‘once upon a time, there was a boy who was so poor that all he had was money.’

‘And then one day,’ said Adrien, ‘a wonderful young lady swept into his life.’

‘They decided they wanted nothing more—’

‘Than to be together—’

‘Forever,’ they said together.

‘That’s so gross,’ said Alix. She held a hand out to Chloe. ‘Pay up.’

‘Gladly.’

Alya walked into the classroom.

Nino shrieked. ‘Your hair!’

She reached up and touched her pixie-cut. ‘You like?’

Nino continued to make whale-like sounds.

‘Wow,’ said Marinette. ‘That’s really different. What made you decide to do that?’

Alya shrugged. ‘I fancied it.’


End file.
